Proof Of Love
by Boston Anonymous
Summary: Logan's trying to prove he's moved on from his parents betrayal. Kendall's trying to prove he will love Logan forever. James is trying to prove to Carlos that he is his one and only. And Gustavo is trying to prove he wont strangle any of them...on purpose. EST. Kogan/Jarlos Sequel to "Loves Labour."
1. Morning

**Disclaimer: Do not own the boys. Original characters are all of my own making.**

**Note: My apologies on this coming so late. I got about halfway through and just got completely stuck. By then I was working on other stories and was just planning on coming back to this later. Bu that didn't happen for a while. Now I think I might know what I want to do with this story. I'm also working on the next chapter of **Meet the Warblers** and **Dressed up in Love**, as well as getting the outline done for the sequel to **Nightmare Before Love**. So updates here will probably be a bit sporadic. Anyways...I hope you all enjoy! **

**Note 2: This is the sequel to _Loves Labour_, my first fic. I apologize that this chapter is so short. I promise the next one will be much longer, I just need to get down and do some serious editing. Thank you to Courtney who asked for this! I'm so happy that you want me to continue the story!**

* * *

Summer light streamed in through the half open window, giving the bedroom a hazy glow. Though it was morning light, the clock held a time dangerously close to noon, signaling the end of a beautiful start of the day.

Kendall, however, barely noticed this.

Instead, he choose to pay close attention to how the light curved along the pale, smooth skin that rose and fell with every soft breath. That skin, marred only by occasional freckles and clumsy bruises, covered the heart that belonged to him.

With a soft caress, Kendall traced his fingers along the dips and curves of his beloveds back, eliciting a slight shudder, but nothing more than that.

Kendall smiled before leaning down and littering the back with soft, barely there kisses.

He had no intention of waking the sleeping boy, he just couldn't seem to tear himself away quite yet.

It was Logan's fault, really. Sometime earlier that morning, just as the sun was beginning its slow ascent into the sky, Kendall awoke to the caresses and touches of his lover in need of his immediate attention.

And, honestly, he was never one to deny the boy of anything.

They had spent a good hour sleepily making love, no words exchanged besides quiet moans and each others names mixed with love and need.

When the heavy breathing died down, and their usual positions once again situated, Kendall fell back into his sleepy state easily enough.

Logan, however, must have stayed awake longer, because when Kendall, hours later, opened his eyes to the sharp sun announcing its presence, his usual early bird boy was still fast asleep.

Kendall was glad to let him lie. It was a Saturday, which meant no school. Rehearsals of course, but not untill later in the day.

Placing a soft kiss on the boys head, he gingerly slipped out of bed. He grabbed a t-shirt and the soft cotton pajama bottoms that had been discarded earlier and slid them on.

After pulling up the bed sheet to tuck his boyfriend in further, he leaned down and gave him one last kiss on the head.

"I love you Logan. I love you so much."

* * *

**Short I know. More to come I promise. FFN is uber slow on my little laptop, but the next chapters will be much longer!**

**xoxo BA**


	2. Matthew McConaughey

_He slid his arm around her waist, pulling her in close. She gazed longingly into his eyes, demanding him silently to tell her the words she needed to hear. Would he be man enough to be what she needed? Would he defeat her inner demons, so she could unleash the lustful, savory, forbidden desires that resided in her heart..and loins..._

"James? What the hell are you reading?" James blinked a bit and tilted his head back, regarding his taller friend who loomed over him, green eyes reading the page he had just been perusing.

He was laying on the orange couch, back against the far end near the window. His legs spread out the length of the couch and were opened just a bit as his shorter boyfriend, Carlos, leaned against his chest. He had been reading the most recent romance novel his mother had sent him, _Her Womanly Desires_, while Carlos had been working on a charcoal drawing, his newest art obsession.

"Uh...nothing..." James started, throwing the book over his shoulder behind the couch. He did not want his friend to judge his reading habits. "Where's Logan?"

Kendall smiled a silly grin and said, "Still sleeping."

James raised an eyebrow, "Late night?"

Kendall snorted and headed towards the kitchen, "None of your business Diamond."

James laughed at his retreating friend, knowing Kendall wasn't one to kiss and tell, especially to him. He couldn't blame him. He rarely liked to share his alone time with Carlos.

Speaking of which...

James looked down at the drawing Carlos was working on. His hands were covered in black charcoal, and, James had no doubt, the black smudged would be evident on other parts of his face and body as well. The boy had no way of keeping himself clean when working on his art, instead putting his whole body and soul into whatever he was creating.

James found it ridiculously endearing and adorable, and often told the boy, who would blush at the comment so hard James had to kiss away the red.

He shifted himself a bit to get a good glance at the boys current piece of work, then dropped his mouth open in surprise.

"Is...is that me?" He asked, looking at his reflection in shades of gray and black.

Carlos jerked a bit, coming out of his trance he often fell into when working, which led to blocking out most everything going on around him, and turned to James nervously.

"Uh...yeah...I just...You're all I can think about today...so that's all I could draw."

James turned to Carlos, regarding the boys nervous expression mixed with a bitten lip and unmet eyes. He couldn't help himself, and placed a gentle hand under the boys chin and pulled him close, kissing the nerves away.

James could never understand why Carlos had no sight for how talented he was. Carlos worked with art because he loved it, but he never thought any of this work was actually worthy of praise. James often encouraged the boy, and hopped one day he would realize what amazing talent he held.

"I love it so much. It looks just like me!" James took the picture out of his lovers hands, holding it close to inspect it more.

"It's not completely done..." Carlos began, nervously twisting his hands together, fear at James's reaction obvious.

James, however, loved what he held in his hands.

"You even got that special Diamond twinkle in my eyes," he exclaimed, waggling his eye brows at his younger lover, who rolled his own eyes and shook his head, smiling.

"Well I think it's perfect, but if you still want to work on it some more, let me know when you're done. I want to frame it." James said, handing the notebook back to Carlos, trying hard not to smile at the boys open mouth.

"Y-you do?"

James shrugged, "Yeah! Of course. It's amazing. I swear you get better and better every time you do something Carlos. And you don't even take classes. That's talent." He pulled the boy in close for another swift kiss before jumping up from his spot, not even needing to turn around to know that Carlos had a dumbfounded look on his face.

Even though everyone encouraged his art, Carlos always worried that his stuff was still amateurish and lame. James was right, he hadn't ever taken a class, not since he was 8 and his art teacher made fun of his power ranger's painting. But every time James had something positive to say about his work, he felt like maybe he was really onto something.

James sauntered over to the kitchen where Kendall was making some cereal. He opened the cupboard and pulled out two more bowls, and set about making him and Carlos some cereal as well.

"You should get Logan up. We're going to have to leave for the studio soon." James said to Kendall.

"Yes mom." Kendall mocked, nudging his friend good-heartedly.

James turned back and shot a glance at his boyfriend who was tearing apart the couch, looking for the TV remote and completely unaware of his smudging everything he touched with charcoal.

Turning back to the blond, James asked in a lowered voice. "Hey...Kendall. I've been meaning to ask. How is Logan doing...with...ya know. Everything?"

Kendall heaved a small sigh and turned back to Carlos as well, smiling a little at the sight. He moved his head back towards James and said, "Better. A lot better. Some days are hard, but I think he's finally...moving past everything." he paused, "At least I hope so. You...know how he can be."

James nodded as he poured the milk into the Cheerios. He _did_ know how Logan could be, sometimes even better than Kendall. Their smart friend had a tendency to hide parts of his life from his friends, no matter how dark or sad they were.

Only a few months ago did that darkness rear its ugly head in the form of an unsteady doctor from Logan's past who tried to force the boy into mental breakdown to "cure" his homosexuality, even after Logan had escaped his clutches years ago. The situation was only made worse when Logan had been hand delivered to the doctor by his parents, who he had to seek emancipation from to finally free himself from the prospect of being corrupted by his narrow minded parents. Though he was safe from their clutches, he was now under legal guardianship of their producer, Gustavo Roque. Luckily, Gustavo was as fit as boulder to care for a teenager, and he was still living and under the care of Mrs. Knight.

Kendall interrupted James's thoughts when he said, almost accusingly, "Why? Has he said anything to you?"

James shook his head, and tried not to take his friends tone to seriously. James and Logan had always been close, but James had seen Logan's ability to...divert the truth at a young age. Logan was sneaky, but he had acquired such a trait as a defense against his parents and the doctor. Because of James being aware of this, Logan would sometimes come to James first about problems before Kendall. James accidentally discovered Logan's sexual orientation before anyone else. And he had seen Logan's sneaky actions first hand.

But this trend had fallen to the wayside as Logan became more and more comfortable with his relationship with Kendall. Often when Logan was upset or worried about something, he would go straight to Kendall first, which James knew made his taller friend immensely pleased. No one could deny that Kendall was head over heels for Logan, and that Logan reciprocated those feelings exactly.

But, James knew that Logan was also in a precarious situation. He now had little to no family, and if he lost Kendall...he would be alone like never before. And that state could make anyone hesitant to give their whole heart away. But with every passing day Kendall proved his loved for Logan over and over.

He had made his way back to the couch, placing the bowl in front of Carlos who was eagerly channel surfing, but abandoned his quest for cartoons when the food was placed in front of him

"Thanks James!" He exclaimed, dropping the remote to devour the food. Like a typical artist, he had a tendency to get caught up in his current body of work, forgetting to stop and nourish himself. Luckily James was always on him, and made sure he ate regularly. He hadn't realized how bad it could get until one dance practice Carlos passed out, scaring his friends near to death.

The news started playing, but James chose to ignore it as he turned to Kendall, "So what do you think were going to do for rehearsals today?"

Kendall shrugged, hoping James didn't bring up waking Logan up again. He really wanted the boy to sleep for as long as possible. He still had nightmares about the time the doctor had him, and sometimes about his parents. Kendall often woke in the middle of the night to Logan calling out for his mother, but in the morning when Kendall tried to get Logan to talk about it, he would just brush him off.

Kendall worried about Logan not talking to him about it, but he hoped that he discussed it with his Therapist, Dr. Mira, who Logan still saw every other week.

"Probably scales scales and more scales?" Kendall answered with a grimace. He loved singing and dancing with his friends, but today just felt like such a lazy day. "Man...I wish we had the day off." He continued.

James sighed, "Yeah me to man. But you know Gustavo. The only way we'd get a day off if we were dead."

Kendall gave a short laugh, "Or he was dead."

James laughed a little harder, "Or he was kidnapped by Russian spies."

Elbowing his friend with a laugh Kendall continued on, "Or he fell down a well...if the well was big enough."

Carlos jumped in, joining along with his friends, "Or he was arrested!"

"This just in. Gustavo Roque of Roque Records, owned by media mogul Arthur Griffin, was arrested this morning."

Carlos let out a surprised yelp while Kendall's mouth opened in shock, milk and Cheerios dripping out of it.

The cheerful blond with to much jewelry smiled as she replayed the story to viewers. "According to sources, the record producer of such bands as Boyz in the Attic and currently Big Time Rush, was arrested for accosting famous actor Matthew McConaughey. Here's Adam with more on that."

The camera panned to a well dressed man with golden skin and a sly white smile. His hair was slicked back and shimmered in the light as he cheerfully began speaking. "Apparently Matthew McConaughey and Gustavo Roque got into a little fender bender this morning. While sources say that Matthew McConaughey was calm during the incident, apparently when he told the record producer to, "Chill man. It's all good." All three boys winced when they heard Matthews quote, "Mr. Roque flew into a rage, tackling the man to the ground."

The scene changed to a video taken on someones phone, which showed Gustavo flying at Matthew McConaughey, tackling him and eventually sitting on him.

Carlos let out a laugh and exclaimed, "I taught him that!" but shrunk nervously under both Kendall and James's glare.

"While Gustavo Roque suffered no injuries, Matthew has been reported to have three broken ribs, a broken leg, and a concussion. More on this in a minute."

Kendall shut off the TV and stood, running his hands through his hair, trying desperately not to freak out. What if they put Gustavo in jail. What if BTR fell apart?...What if they took Logan away?

"Well...at least we have the day off?" Carlos offered, then immediately went back to his cereal to avoid Kendall's death glare.

James stood as well, pulling out his phone. "Call Kelly. Let's find out what's going on."

Taking a deep breath Kendall nodded and grabbed the phone before he pressed Kelly's contact in James's phone. It rang a few times before a haggard and rushed, "Hello?" came from their normally sweet and tenderhearted assistant.

"Kelly! Hi! So...the guys and I were just watching the news and..."

"I know! Gustavo was arrested for attacking Matthew McConaughey!" she exclaimed.

"So...we were just wondering-" but Kendall was cut off as Carlos exclaimed loudly, "Do we have the day off?"

Kendall waved away his friend, giving him another glare as James rolled his eyes at him.

"Look. I'm on my way to post bail now. But after that who knows. I don't know if Matthew has pressed charges yet, so let's just take it one thing at a time okay?"

Kendall opened his mouth to respond but Kelly had hung up. He let out a haggard breath and handed back the phone to James.

"What do we do?" James asked, but before Kendall could say anything, Carlos jumped up from behind the couch, dressed in sunglasses, pool shorts, a t shirt and was carrying three floaties shaped like sea animals.

"Pool time!" he exclaimed, a bright smile adorning his face.

"Carlos! This is really serious. If Gustavo goes to jail, that means no more Big Time Rush!" James said, going over to his boyfriend to yank one of the floaties, a sea turtle, out of his hands.

"Oh. But Matthew won't press any charges. He's cool like that." Carlos said with certainty in his voice.

Kendall gave his naive friend a confused face before responding, "Gustavo sat on him. In public!"

Carlos just scoffed and waved Kendall's words away.

Shaking his head at his friends naivete, Kendall said, "Anyways! Right now let's just do what Kelly said and take it one thing at a time. But for now, _don't_ tell Logan."

"Don't tell Logan what?"

All three boys yelped and turned around to see their raven haired friend standing there, rubbing his eyes sleepily with bed head and rumpled p.j's.

"Uh...don't tell Logan," Kendall started, going over to his boyfriend to wrap him up in a good morning hug, "that...uh...we have today off!"

Logan gave Kendall a confused look. "Well...I mean...I didn't want them two," he pointed to James and Carlos, "to tell you. I," he pointed to himself, "wanted to tell you that we had the day off. And...were going to the pool!" he exclaimed, grabbing one of Carlos's sea floaties, a little shark.

"Hey!" Carlos exclaimed, grabbing the shark floatie back, "Go easy with Mr. Bubbles. He's very sensitive."

Logan shrugged and said, "Great! Well I guess I'll go get changed then." he went to head to the bedroom, after Kendall gave him a kiss on the cheek.

After Logan left he turned to the other two, "Like I said, not a word!"

James sighed, "That's not fair Kendall. Logan has a right to know his _legal guardian_ has been arrested for attacking a mediocre actor."

"He's not mediocre!" Carlos shot back, "He's brilliant!"

James smirked and walked over to his boyfriend, wrapping an arm around him. "Do I have to worry about Matthew McConaughey trying to steal you away?"

Carlos blushed and shook his head. He opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by James iPhone ringing. James let Carlos go and reached for his phone, pulling it out with a frown.

"Is it Kelly?" Kendall exclaimed excitedly, but James shook his head. "Nope. Cori, the new girl."

Dropping the third sea creature floatie, a crab, Carlos placed his hands on his hips, giving the boy a glare.

"Why is she calling you? And why does she have your number?" Carlos exclaimed, his voice rattled by nerves.

James rolled his eyes and hit ignore, before turning back to him. "I didn't give it to her. She must have gotten it from someone else."

Carlos scoffed, "That's believable, since every girl here has your number!"

James placed his own hands on his hips before saying, "I can't help it if all the girls here fell under the Diamond charm."

Carlos rolled his eyes and looked away, ignoring Kendall's stifled giggles at their argument.

"You know I'm not seeing them anymore. You should trust me!" James exclaimed, stepping closer to Carlos but still frustrated with his boyfriends behavior.

Carlos threw his hands up in exasperation and said, "Of course I trust you. You don't see me going into your phone to erase other girls numbers like Kendall does with Logan."

Carlos threw a satisfied smirk Kendall's way when the boy's giggles stopped and instead were replaced with a nervous stuttering, "I-I-I don't do that!"

A chorus of 'yeah rights' and 'uh-huh's came from James and Carlos. Kendall cleared his throat nervously and said, "I-I'm gonna go change for the pool." before leaving the room towards his and Logans bedroom.

James and Carlos watched him go. James turned back to Carlos with a sigh and went over to the boy, gathering him in his arms, even though Carlos refused to return the hug.

"Baby. You are the only one for me. I swear. I love you so much. I don't want any other girl. I promise."

Carlos sighed and nodded his head, angry at his own insecurities. Ever since they had gotten together James had been nothing but a gentleman towards him and he should really trust him more. He just couldn't get past some things. Like James's player past. Or the fact that James was ridiculously gorgeous. He just couldn't help but worry that James would find someone else, someone better.

Carlos turned in James's arms, pulling him in close and tight. He buried his face in his chest and took a deep breath. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he knew that he wouldn't have James forever. He knew that he should take every moment with him and cherish it, before the pretty boy moved on, as he would inevitably do.

Carlos took a small step back and looked up to James's eyes, "I'm sorry." He said.

James smiled down at Carlos and leaned forward till their noses touched, giving him a small chaste kiss. "No worries." he answered.

The door to their friends bedroom opened, revealing revealing Logan's and Kendall's head popping out from the sides. Logan had his eyes covered, and said, "Is it okay to come out now? Is all forgiven?"

James sighed, knowing that Kendall must have warned Logan about his and Carlos's fight.

"Yeah. Were good."

* * *

"What do you mean arrested!"

"Mom! Seriously keep it down!" Kendall hissed at his mother, taking her gently by the arm and guiding her from their place next to the kitchen sink where they were doing dishes, and into the bathroom. He chanced a glance back at the living room, and saw that Logan was busy helping Carlos with his homework on the orange couch. Unfortunately the Latino was more interested in the doodles he was making than any algebra. Kendall had to give his love credit for trying though.

After shutting the bathroom door he turned to his mother, a frown evident with her arms crossed. "Explain." she demanded.

Rubbing the back of his neck he sheepishly said, "Well...apparently he attacked Matthew McConaughey-"

"Attacked!" His mother exclaimed, then sighed when her son placed a finger against his lips, saying "Shh!"

"Okay. Attack is a strong word...confronted. Let's go with that? He _confronted_ Matthew McConaughey and it kinda sorta maybe led to him ending up in the hospital. Minor injuries of course!" He finished with a nervous laugh as his mother opened her mouth to say something.

"Kelly's taking care of it. I swear." The blond crossed his heart and held up his right hand swearing an oath.

Mama knight sighed again and said, "Okay. But where does that leave Logan? He's still months away from turning 18. The state could easily take him away if they wanted to." Kendall nodded, feeling his chest constrict at the thought. He couldn't loose Logan. Just just _couldn't_.

"We're just going to have to wait and see what happens. There really isn't anything we can do." Mama Knight said, before continuing, "What did Logan say when you told him?"

Kendall bit his lip and said, "Um...well about _that_..."

"You haven't told him!"

"There's no reason for him to know about it and get all worried if it's just going to turn out to be nothing!" Kendall said, holding up his hands in defense against his mothers anger.

The elder Knight sighed and said, "Kendall...that's not fair. Logan should know about this."

"You're right. And I will tell him...after I talk to Kelly about whats going to happen."

"Kendall..." She began, but the boy clasped his hands together, pleading, "Please mom. Logan's been through so much and I don't want him stressing out about stuff and getting worse. I will tell him soon, I just want all the facts before I do it."

Not happy with the way things were going, but knowing she shouldn't interfere, Mama Knight resigned with a nod, "I hope you know what you're doing honey."

* * *

**xoxo BA **


	3. Maybe

Logan still wasn't used to this.

The L.A sun shone bright through the white shades lining the large windows of Dr. Mira's office. The constant rays lit up the room, which was easy enough considering the plush white couches and dark mahogany soaked up the rays like water.

Logan sat comfortably on one of the plush white couches, waiting for his psychologist, Dr. Mira to take her seat.

"So Logan, how are you college applications coming along?" She asked, her voice as ever calm and soothing as it had been the first time he met her. She had been a great help to him since...the incident. Since he lost his parents. They had been spending a lot of time together, wading through his past. Helping him let go of his fears and turn towards a better future for himself.

Logan gave half a shrug and said, "Good. They take some time, but I'm excited." It was true. He was excited. College was like a fresh start for him, giving him something to focus on besides everything that had happened to him.

Dr. Mira nodded, sinking into a plush chair across from Logan. "Does the rest of your friends know that you're applying?"

He nodded, "Yeah. I'm going to see how it goes. I was hoping that maybe I can take some online courses for a while. So I won't be to far behind when I start going full time."

"So you're planning on working with the band still after graduating?" Her voice held as a question, but there was a hint of something else behind what she was saying that Logan wasn't sure what it meant, so he just nodded his answer.

"That could be difficult, a lot of work." She said, writing something down on her notebook perched neatly on her lap, "College is very different from high school. You wont be the smartest person in the room anymore."

Logan shrugged and said, "Yeah, I know. But I like the idea of a challenge. Although, I might even just put off college for a while. No rush right?" The idea had been tugging at his mind a bit. Truthfully he was exhausted. A big part of him just wanted a break from academics, to just take some time and see what else was out in the world before he started school. He knew himself to well, and once he was on the road to becoming a doctor he wouldn't stop. He liked the idea of maybe touring around the country with his friends a bit, since none of them had any immediate college plans, and seeing how far Big Time Rush could go.

Dr. Mira crossed her legs and said, "I guess not, but who said that? Kendall?"

A little confused, Logan shrugged and said, "No one...I guess. It was just a thought."

"Hm. And what are Kendall's plans after you two graduate? Does he still want to work with the band as well?" She raised her eyebrows, indicating she wasn't to happy with Logan's declaration of putting off college.

Logan shrugged again and said, "I guess so. I don't know. We haven't really talked about the future...to much." He shifted, still confused with Dr. Mira's questions that kept turning back to Kendall. Didn't she know that Kendall would support him no matter what he decided to do?

The doctor sighed and said, "You still have...what? Seven months until you turn eighteen?"

Logan nodded, his stomach still queasy with memories even after all this time.

Sighing, Dr. Mira put her notebook on the small table next to her chair and then folded her hands. She seemed to take a moment to collect her thoughts before speaking,"You know, Logan...I actually wanted to talk to you about your relationship. With Kendall."

He frowned at his doctor as he tilted his head to the side, confused. "What do you mean?"

"Well...the two of you are very...close." She began, shifting again while trying to find the best way to approach what she wanted to say.

"Yes...?" Logan said, not sure where she was going with this.

"It just seems like...you depend on him. A lot." She held out her hands, hoping he was catching onto what she wanted to say, "You live with him at a very young age. That is a big deal for a young relationship. Many people wait years before moving in with their significant other."

"Well...I don't have very much choice in that do I?" Logan said, crossing his arms, still confused.

Nodding, Mira said, "True...but it is an unusual situation for someone of your age."

Logan went back to fidgeting with his hands again. "Um...okay."

"Well...sometimes depending on a person so much, can be an unhealthy thing Logan. Have you...ever thought about what would happen if the two of you broke up?"

Suddenly Logan felt his throat go dry and he quickly looked away, "Um...I don't know."

"You don't know if you ever think about it...or if you do you don't know what you would do if you two broke up." She said, pushing Logan to further examine the question.

As sweat pooled in his hands, he rubbed his hands up and down his pants, still not looking at her. "I don't know. Both?"

"Do you ever think about what it would be like to be with another person? Someone other than Kendall?"Her words were like a bomb going off in Logan's head. The thought of being with someone else? Anyone else? He couldn't even imagine it. It made him sick to even consider Kendall wanting someone else.

Logan immediately shook his head. "No. I-I don't want anyone else." _And neither does Kendall_, Logan thought.

"But let's say something happens...and you two are no longer together...do you ever think about that?"

She pushed again.

Logan began feeling suffocated, unable to breath and the room felt incredibly warm to him. "C-can I open a window?" He asked, looking away from the woman as he tried to get his breathing under control.

Dr. Mira nodded and headed over to the window, opening it up wide for him to let some air in. She then headed over to a table near her desk and got Logan some water. As she handed the boy the drink, she took a seat next to Logan and placed a tender hand on his shoulder.

"Logan. I don't mean to upset you. I just want you to be realistic about the situation you are in."

He turned to her with a confused look. "I'm pretty aware of my situation Dr. Mira."

She sighed as she pulled her hand back. "Logan. You are very lucky for having so many people in your life who were there for you when things were rough. But, people don't always stay around forever, and you're still very young. I just...I feel that you need to become more prepared for when you have to take care of yourself. For doing things that are right for you, and only you."

Logan shook his head, still confused, "I'm not following."

Dr. Mira stood to go back to her seat. "Logan...realistically you and Kendall won't be together forever. You two are just...to young. There will be obstacles and opportunities in life that will eventually take you in separate directions." She sat back down, "I want you to be prepared, mentally, to handle being on your own. Without a safety net. Without someone there to catch you besides yourself."

Logan looked down at his drink with a frown. He could understand what his doctor was saying. Hadn't he even told Camille once that over 90% of teenage relationships don't last? Chances are that he and Kendall wouldn't be together forever...

But the thought of not being with Kendall tore at his heart with more pain than loosing his parents.

"I-I understand." He whispered.

Dr. Mira sighed, not happy with the way this conversation was going. She knew that the two boys loved each other dearly, but she had to do what was right for Logan, and that was preparing him for the future without the safety of a loving home to fall back on if things got tough. She wanted Logan to be a strong, independent man who could live a happy, fulfilling life. But he would never accomplish that if he fell apart when things got tough, or gave up on opportunities to stay where it was safe.

"We don't have to talk about this now Logan. Let's just leave it as something to think about for a while okay?" Dr. Mira said, hoping the boy would brighten up a bit.

"Okay." He said, offering her a small smile.

"So...tell me how things are with Gustavo?"

* * *

Carlos was trying. Really he was...but damn it was hard. James was sitting pool side with the new girl, Cori, talking about something. Both were laughing and seeming to get along great.

Which just seemed to make Carlos all that more nervous.

Carlos jumped when he felt his phone buzzing, sitting up from his pool chair he pulled out his phone to regard the new text message.

_Still trying to get a hold of Kelly. Keep Logan busy till I find out whats going on-Ken_

Carlos bit his lip. Kendall still hadn't told Logan about Gustavo? Carlos didn't want to get in the middle of this, considering he had his own boyfriend to worry about, but he could understand where Kendall was coming from.

Another burst of laughter from James and Cori. Carlos had to grit his teeth not to go over and push the girl into the pool.

_Gotta keep it together Carlos. You have to trust James. He's never given you any reason to think he would cheat on you. It's fine. No worries..._

"Oh James. You're so funny!" Cori sang out, placing her manicured hand on James's sculpted arm.

"That's it!" Carlos growled, jumping up from his chair to stomp over to the girl.

Until Logan showed up in his line of sight, jumping onto his path of rage. "You okay there Litos?" Logan asked, casting a glance at James and Cori talking.

The Latino boy crossed his arms and huffed out a "Yes...no...maybe...I-I don't know." Carlos brought his hands to his face and let out a whine, trying to figure out what he should do.

Logan grabbed his friend by the arm and dragged him over to the smoothie counter. "James isn't going to cheat on you Carlos. He's crazy about you."

As Logan held up two fingers to the guy making smoothies for of them, Carlos cast another glance back at James and Cori, who were currently splashing each other with water.

"I know...but...it's James! Every person here wants to jump his bones. What if...what if he gets bored with me and leaves?"

Both boys grabbed their smoothies and Logan headed into the lobby, knowing this conversation would go easier if James' wasn't in eyesight.

Logan waited for Carlos to take a seat so Logan could sit on his left side. He was half-deaf in his right ear, due to an unfortunate punishment back when he was younger by his father, but only Kendall and Dr. Mira knew about it.

"Carlos...can I ask you a kind of tough question without you getting to upset?" Logan asked his friend nervously.

Carlos let out a snort and said, "Try me. My boyfriend is playing splishy splashy with some chick, can't get more upset than that."

Logan looked down at his blue smoothie and said, "Do...do you think that you and I will be with James and Kendall...for like ever?"

Carlos shot a look up at Logan, then frowned. He always assumed that James would up and leave him one day, he had expected it from the day they had gotten together. He wasn't anything special and considering the star studded path James was already on, he was bound to meet loads of better people.

But Logan and Kendall? He thought that if anyone could make it, _they_ would.

"You...you're not thinking of breaking up with Kendall...are you?" Carlos asked, fear seeping into his stomach. That would _destroy_ Kendall.

Logan quickly shook his head, holding up his hands in defense, "No! No. Not at all. I'm...it's just that...when you think about it...in the long run." He paused to gather his thoughts before continuing, "Maybe it's silly of us to get worried and jealous when chances are that all of our lives will one day go in opposite directions, and none of this will really matter anymore."

Carlos could feel his own frown grow deeper, and that fear settle restlessly in his stomach some more.

"Logan...where is this coming from?" Carlos asked, concern evident in his voice.

But Logan shook his head again, "It's nothing. Just me...thinking out loud."

Carlos went to asked Logan to explain just where this thinking was coming from, but he felt his phone buzz again. He reached into his pocket and pulled it out, seeing another message from Kendall.

_Bad news. Get James and get back here now. Sending Katie to distract Logan.-Ken_

Just as he shut off his phone the elevator doors opened, revealing a sour faced female Knight stepping out and heading in their direction. She was carrying a few heavy books and stomped over to the two, dropping the books onto Logan's lap, which earned him an "Ouch! Hey what gives?"

"I need help with my math." Katie said, monotone, crossing her arms with an annoyed expression.

Logan regarded the books with confusion, "Really? You _never_ need help with your math."

"Well...I do today. So let's go!" She said pushing the smart boy up and out the lobby.

Carlos followed behind and leaned down to whisper, "So how much did he pay you?"

Katie turned her head a bit and answered, "Enough to get that new Zombie Smashers: Revenge of the Undead game I want."

Smiling, Carlos and she high fived before she headed off to a cabana with a confused Logan.

Carlos watched them go before he turned to his boyfriend, still with Cori_._ With an evil smile he began walking over to the two, whistling nonchalantly, until he snuck up behind them.

Taking a deep breath, he then shouted, "James!" James wasn't so easy to startle, having grown up with the three other boys and their tricks.

Cori however...

"Ah!" She screamed jumping and flailing a bit as she fell into the pool.

"Carlos!" James exclaimed, turning back to his boyfriend with a frown before helping to pull the girl out.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you." He threw a fake smirk at the soaking we girl, "But Kendall needs some help back in the apartment." He normally hated being mean, but when James was involved...all bets were off.

James rolled his eyes before turning back to Cori, "I've gotta go. I'll see you later okay?"

She nodded, shivering a bit as the water dripped off her. Carlos gave her another fake smile before walking off with James.

When they were in the elevator James crossed his arms and regarded his boyfriend with a frown. "What was that?" He demanded.

Carlos shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets, avoiding James's gaze.

"What was what?"

"Scaring Cori. You weren't doing that because you were jealous were you?" James asked, grabbing Carlos's arm to get his attention.

Carlos looked down at James's grip, and thought back to Logan's words.

_Maybe it's silly of us to get worried and jealous when chances are that all of our lives will one day go in opposite directions, and none of this will really matter anymore._

"I'm sorry." Was all Carlos could say.

James let out a disappointed sigh as he let go of Carlos. When the elevator doors opened, he said. "I really expected more from you Carlos." Before he exited the elevator.

Carlos bit his lip, Logan's words still echoing in his memory.

Was he expecting more from his relationship with James?

Was he expecting to much?

* * *

"Wait...but I thought that was a good thing." James asked, dipping his head to the side, watching in confusion as his taller friend passed back and forth in front of he and Carlos, as they sat on the couch.

Kendall was obviously worried, muttering and running a nervous hand through his blond locks.

"Yeah. I thought we didn't want Matthew McConaughy to press charges." Carlos continued as well.

James turned to his boyfriend and said, "By the way, I guess you were right. Matt was a cool enough guy to let that go."

Carlos's eyes slid over to James for a moment, then back to Kendall, ignoring his boyfriends comment. James couldn't help but frown at that. _Maybe I was to rough on him about the whole Cori thing...?_

Kendall's voice cut off James's trail of thought, "I know. And it is a good thing he dropped the charges. But DSS want's to inspect Logan's home life to make sure that Gustavo is fit to take care of him."

"And...?" James said, still looking at Carlos with a frown.

"And we all know that Gustavo is no where near fit to take care of him. If DSS was coming here, that would be one thing..."

James let out a snort, "Even then it would be tricky."

Kendall turned to his friend and shot him a glare, "You got something to say about my mom raising us?" Kendall stalked up to him, fist balled and voice tinged with accusation.

Carlos was up in an instant, getting between his friend and boyfriend. "Okay. Chill. Both of you. Kendall," Carlos turned to his friend, "Relax. James didn't mean anything by it. You're just stressed cause you're worried about Logan. We get it. Now," Carlos turned to James, avoiding looking into his eyes, "How are we going to turn Gustavo into superdad overnight?"

James wanted nothing more than to tell Kendall to shove it and drag Carlos into the other room to find out what was going on with the boy. He couldn't really think that he had feelings for that girl, could he?

"Well...I never had a dad so I'm no use." Kendall said, crossing his arms to fall onto the couch with a huff.

"And my dad was barely there when I grew up, so I've got nothing either." James continued, following Kendall's lead with his arms crossed and a flop onto the couch.

Somber silence filled the air. Carlos looked between the two disgruntled and sad faces before rolling his eyes, throwing his hands on his hips and shouting out a, "C'mon!"

Both James and Kendall looked at each other confused before turning to their Latino friend. "Kendall. You've been more like a dad to Katie than most kids out there who already have dads!" Carlos then turned to James, grabbing his boyfriends arm and lifting him up off the couch. He took his hand in his, which made James feel a little better, and said, "And James, your dad has always been really lame at telling you how he feels about you, but he at least tries. And he cares."

James felt his mouth split into a smile before Carlos turned over to Kendall, grabbing his arm and pulling him up. "_We_ are Logan's family now. We may not be the perfect traditional family, but we love Logan just as much, and like a real family we are going to fight to keep him with us. Got it?"

Kendall and James looked at each other, a silent truce for now, before nodding. "Okay. Let's do this."

* * *

"You...you mean I have to touch him?" Gustavo asked, disgust written on his face. He turned to face his angered assistant, then Mama Knight, before turning back to Kelly again. "Like...with my hands?"

Both women heaved out aggravated sighs and turned away from the older man. They were residing in the living room of his mansion, Carlos, James and Kendall no where in sight.

"Yes. You have to hug him to let the social services lady know _that...you...care_!" Kelly exclaimed before banging her head with her clipboard.

Gustavo let out a whine and grunt and said, "I do care. I care about keeping Logan here so that we don't have to break up my meal ticket!" He flinched when Mama Knight shot him a glare, "I mean band. Break up my band."

Just then Carlos and James came out of the hallway into the living room. Carlos's face was covered in pudding, and James had a bright smile on his face. "Okay. The kitchen is stocked with junk food and sodas. Everything a teenage boy would love to eat."

"But there is some healthy things in there to, right?" Mama Knight asked.

James and Carlos frowned and looked at each other, before James snapped his fingers and said, "Well...fruit roll ups have fruit in it, right?"

Mama Knight gave an aggravated sigh as Kendall came bursting into the room "Okay. I've got a TV room filled with games and violent movies. And I put a bunch of Logan's clothes and shoes in the guest bedroom. Are you guys done here?"

James gave a small laugh and said, "Why. You worried about Logan and Camille seeing a movie together? Has Logan stopped replying after your 8th text?"

Kendall walked over and smacked James in the head.

"Well we would be done by now if Gustavo here wasn't being difficult!" Kelly said, shooting the man a glare.

Gustavo scoffed and said, "I just have some stipulations about this whole...being nice..."

"Well to bad!" Mama Knight shouted, "If you want these boys to stay together then you just have to suck it up."

"Yeah!" James agreed. "We're only in this mess because you sat on Matthew McConaughy."

Letting out a grunt and turning away from the others, Gustavo replied, "Yeah well...he deserved it...telling me to "chill out." Seriously who says that?"

"Okay!" Kendall exclaimed, getting between the arguing sides and holding his hands out. He wanted to just get this over with, and yes because he might be a little worried about Camille and Logan spending more than three seconds together. "Gustavo the social services lady comes tomorrow so you had better be ready to be super nice to Logan. Everything else is all set, just don't screw it up."

Gustavo rolled his eyes before letting out a sigh and saying, "I wont."

Kendall then turned to his mother and said, "Do you mind spending a little more time with him. Just letting him know things about Logan in case the social worker asks?"

"Hey! I know plenty of things about Logan!" Gustavo exclaimed.

"Oh yeah? Like what?" Kendall shot back, arms crossed.

Looking back and forth between the two Knights, Gustavo said, "Well he wants to be a doctor. He wears sweater vests...he likes...um...books?"

"And...?" Kendall encouraged.

Gustavo's face scrunched up in thought, before he said, "Yeah...I didn't really expect there to be much else interesting about him so I stopped caring after the whole books thing."

The entire room heaved sighs of aggravation, before Mama Knight turned to Kelly and said, "We're going to be here all night aren't we?"

* * *

Kendall flopped onto his bed, breathing out a tired, heavy sigh. The social worker was coming to Gustavo's tomorrow to meet with Logan, who still had no clue about what as going on.

Kendall could not wait for tomorrow to be over.

The sound of his bedroom door shutting signaled that his lover had entered the room. Rolling tiredly over onto his side, Kendall shot a glance at Logan.

He did not look happy.

The smart boy had his hands on his hips and was giving Kendall a glare that signaled death. Sitting up with a frown, Kendall nervously said, "H-hey baby...what's up?"

Logan crossed his arms and said, "Why don't you tell me?"

"Um..."

Crossing the room to stand in front of Kendall, Logan ticked off on his outstretched fingers, "First we had the day off yesterday...which never happens. Then Katie needs help in math, which happens even less. Then you finally let me and Camille hang out without you freaking out...to much." Logan paused, waiting for Kendall to say something, "Somethings going on Ken."

Kendall knew now was the time to tell Logan everything that happened...

...But he just couldn't.

Wrapping his arms around Logan, the taller boy pulled him in close, placing soft kisses on his neck.

"Nothings going on Logie. You're just being paranoid and overreacting." Kendall felt like a jerk for lying to Logan, but he knew how the boy would react. Up _all_ night worrying. Better to let him get a good nights rest and then tell him in the morning. By then he wouldn't have any time to freak out and instead could focus on getting through the day.

"You...you promise?" Logan asked, falling into Kendall's touches and caresses. Even though his instincts told him something was up, he really trusted Kendall. If something bad was going on, Logan was sure Kendall would tell him.

"Mmm hmm." Kendall hummed, drawing the boy in for a kiss. Better to take what he could now, because once Logan found out, was in the dog house in a big way for a long time.

* * *

**xoxo BA**


	4. Mistakes

Hello! I promise promise promise I am working on my other stories. A new chapter to Meet the Warblers will be up soon, as well as the first chapter to the sequel to Nightmare Before Love. I promise neither have been abandoned!

* * *

Logan stared at the clock.

5:30am

He had barely gotten a bit of sleep last night. Despite Kendall's words, Logan couldn't shake the worried feeling that something was...off.

Granted, he also couldn't get Dr. Mira's words out of his head. He felt sort of bad for dropping some of it on Carlos when he was in such a vulnerable position, but he needed to hear the words out loud, get another persons reaction.

That reaction hadn't been good.

But he had to consider her words. His logical brain wouldn't let it go. She _did_ have a point. But he couldn't fully go along with her thought process. He loved Kendall, to much to ever let him go, even now. But he could also see where his immense dependence on the boy could cause issues in the future. Both were to young to handle such responsibility of relying on each other so much...

But he just couldn't let go.

Needing to get out of his head for a while, he slipped out of Kendall's sleep hold, threw on some comfy P.J's and slippers, headed out into the living room. He knew he wasn't going to be getting any sleep, so he might as well get his day started. Also it was a rare occurrence for him to have the apartment to himself. And he knew he would have it for a while, since on a Sunday morning most of his little family didn't rise until ten or noon.

He made a bowl of Cheerios and settled onto the couch, channel surfing a bit until he came to the Discovery Channel.

"Mythbusters Marathon? Nice!" He said to himself, settling back onto the orange couch to enjoy the next few episodes of robots, explosions and experiments.

After a few episodes, nine o'clock rolled around. Just as Logan headed into the kitchen for some juice, he heard a knock at the door.

"Great. If it's Bitters to flip out at Carlos for skateboarding in the lobby again, I don't care if he's dead to the world I'm dragging his butt out here. I'm not listening to Bitters yell at me again." He mumbled to himself as he headed over to the door.

He grabbed the handle and tentatively opened it, wincing as he expected the shouting to begin before the door was even part way open.

Instead, he found himself face to face with a woman. She had smooth dark skin, bright blue eyes and was dressed in comfortable black slacks and a white blouse. She had a black strap briefcase hanging off her right shoulder and held two very full manilla envelopes in both hands, currently sorting through them.

She shot a glance up at Logan and smiled, shifting both folders to one arm so she could outstretched the other to shake his hand. "Logan Mitchell I assume? Helen Banks." She pointed to herself before continuing, "You _do_ look just like your picture. My daughter says you're the cutest one in your band. May I come in?"

Dazed, and shaking the hand a little to limply, Logan shook himself and stuttered, "I-I'm sorry, but you are...?"

Frowning, she pulled out her walled to show him her ID, "I was under the impression you knew about today. You're evaluation concerning whether Gustavo is fit to continue as your guardian?"

Logan looked at the ID, then back at her, "Um...what? I-I thought that was taken care of two months ago after the last evaluation."

She took the ID back and nodded, "Well in light of recent events we've had to reestablish whether that decision was prudent. I was going to meet you at his residency but he was called away on urgent business a few hours ago, and I was told I could find you here. We were scheduled to meet later this afternoon, but I've had to make some adjustments since one of the other workers is out sick." She gave him a small smile, "Got a full load today and everything."

She stepped inside the apartment, regarding it with an amused expression. "Nice place. Not bad for a kid your age."

Rubbing the back of his head as he shut the door Logan said, "I'm sorry...but when you mean recent events...?"

She turned back to Logan, looking him over. After a quiet moment, she raised an eyebrow and said, "You really don't know do you?" He shook his head in answer. Heaving a sigh she went over to the kitchen table and placed her folders and papers down before pulling out a chair, "Okay honey. Have a seat. Looks like we've got a lot to talk about."

* * *

Kendall rolled onto his back, stretching his long legs and arms to crack out the kinks in his body. Letting out a sigh at the realization Logan was no where to be seen, he rolled back over onto his side to gauge the clock next to his bed. It was nearing twelve thirty.

He let out another sigh and sat up. Today was going to be a long, _long_ day. Rubbing his eyes he hopped out of bed and began thinking of ways to get Logan over to Gustavo's. He could easily trick him, but he knew that he should probably sit the boy down and give him a run through of what was going to happen before they left.

Yawning again, Kendall made his way out of his bedroom and down the hallway to the living room area. They didn't have to be there for another couple of hours, so he would have some time to prepare what he was going to say to Logan to ease the blow.

But as he walked into the living room and saw his boyfriend at the kitchen table with a woman he didn't recognize, paper scattered all over the table as the two of them were hunched over, talking quietly, Kendall realized maybe not.

"Um...Logan?" He asked, causing the younger boy and the woman to both look up and regard him.

"Good morning sunshine. Or should I say good afternoon? I'm Helen, Logan's social worker for today." Helen chattered off, offering the taller boy a smile.

However, Kendall was focused on Logan, who was silently regarding him with a mixed expression of sadness, anger and just...

Kendall couldn't place it. But whatever it was...he didn't like it.

Helen then stood and began gathering up her papers. "Well. We should run. I was told Gustavo would be back at his place after one. Why don't you get ready and I'll finish my coffee?" She turned to Logan, smiling.

Logan nodded and stood, walking past Kendall on the way to his bedroom without even a glance. Kendall was torn between asking Helen what she was doing there when she should have been at Gustavo's later, and going after Logan.

He chose Logan.

Darting back to the direction he had just come from without a word to the slightly stunned woman, he quickly dashed back into his bedroom, opening and quickly closing the door behind him.

"Logan...I can explain..." He began, regarding his love who was half-naked and pulling on some jeans.

"Okay Kendall." Logan started, still not looking at him as he searched for his shoes, "Yes. Why don't you explain to me how you lied to me, told me I was being paranoid and overreacting, but turned out to be right in the first place." Taking a seat on the edge of the bed so he could shove his socks on he finally turned to Kendall, anger evident in his eyes, "Yes. Please explain this to me so it all makes sense."

Kendall's mouth opened and closed a few times, not knowing how to start. Logan heaved a sigh and shook his head in disappointment.

"Logan." Kendall started, stepping away from the door to take long strides towards his boyfriend. "I was going to tell you. Even before I saw you and her there. You're right I should have told you sooner. And I shouldn't have lied I-I just didn't want you to worry-"

"Kinda late for that." Logan said, standing up to throw on a black and white t-shirt.

"Look." Kendall reached out and grabbed Logan's arm, but let go after the boy turned to him with a glare, "Everything is all set. Carlos, James and I took care of everything with Mom, Kelly and Gustavo. You don't have to worry-"

"Wait." Logan cut off Kendall, "Everyone else knew?"

"Um..."

Logan let out a scoff and continued, anger dripping with every word. "_Everyone_ knew...and no one told me. You all just let me...walk around like an idiot thinking everything was okay..." He ran a shaky hand through his hair and began walking away from Kendall towards the door, before turning back to him, "You know...maybe we..." he began, but shook his head, turning away.

"W-what?" Kendall asked, confused.

But Logan just shook his head again and continued for the door.

"What? Logan maybe we should what?" Kendall asked, slight fear seeping into his stomach.

Logan pulled open the door and said, "Nothing. Forget it. I-I need to think. Go. I need to go."

Feeling a rising panic Kendall went to follow Logan, saying, "Well...wait. Let me come with you." But stopped moving when Logan held up a hand to stop him with a shake of his head.

"No. Kendall. No."

Kendall wanted to throw Logan back onto the bed yell at the woman to just leave so he could make everything right with his love...but he didn't.

Instead he watched as Helen and Logan both left the apartment together.

_Maybe we..._

Kendall had to swallow back a sob. He couldn't have meant what he thought. There was no way. Logan knew that Kendall could be stupid sometimes, and make mistakes. They both did. It was just how things went with them sometimes.

But the way Logan looked at him...

_Maybe we..._

Should what Logan? What was he thinking?

* * *

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard." James said, shoving another spoonful of Cheerios into his mouth. "Logan would never break up with you." He continued, mouth full.

"I agree with James." Mrs. Knight said, walking over to the couch to sit next to her son to pull him into a half embrace with her arm on his shoulder, "But I also agree with Logan. You should have let him know ages ago about what was going on."

Kendall let out a sigh and shook his head, "I know. I messed up...big time."

"Yeah you did. But I wouldn't worry to much about it." James said comfortingly, "We mess up all the time and forgive each other. It's what we do. At least with everything we've done, Logan should get through this thing just fine." To help his point, he called out, "Right Carlos?"

The quiet Latino, who had been standing at the kitchen counter staring at his bowl of cereal, jerked up quickly when James said his name, "Huh? Oh...yeah." Then he picked up his bowl and left the room.

James blinked in surprise, then turned to Mama Knight and Kendall who were looking at him with confusion as well.

"Are we both in trouble with our boyfriends?" Kendall asked, raising an eyebrow at the pretty boy.

"Um...I didn't think so..." James answered, then stood and followed the path his love just took.

When James walked inside their bedroom, Carlos was sitting on the edge of his bed, staring at the wall across from him.

Now a little more than worried, James held out a hand and waved in front of the boy, "Yoo-hoo. Anyone home?" He called out.

Jerking back again, Carlos turned to James, blinking a bit in surprise at seeing the tall boy, "Oh...hey. What's up?"

"You tell me." James answered, sitting next to Carlos on the bed and pulling the bowl of cereal out of his hands. He placed it on the bedside table, then turned back to Carlos who had gone back to staring at the wall, "What's going on with you?"

"Nothing." Carlos replied, shaking his head and looking down at this hands.

"Babe...we've been together for only a little while, but we've been friends since we were kids. So I don't think you're going to get away with the whole 'I'm fine nothings wrong' act with me, when clearly I know somethings up."

Carlos chewed his bottom lip in worry. He really wanted to tell James about what Logan had told him yesterday, but he knew if he did, that would bring up all his own insecurities. And he just wasn't ready to face them yet.

"I'm just worried about Logan. I really don't want him to have to leave us." Carlos said. He felt it was okay to use this as an excuse, since it wasn't an entire lie. He _was_ worried about this friend...but he was more worried for when he got back. From what Kendall had said, Logan just thinking about breaking up with Kendall had become a lot more of a reality given what just happened between them. He was so worried about it he felt sick.

_Do...do you think that you and I will be with James and Kendall...for like ever?_

James wrapped a loving arm around Carlos, squeezing him tight and putting on a brave face. He was worried as well...but had hope that they could pull this off.

"Don't worry Carlos...we've gotten out of worse situations before. No one's taking Logan away from us." James kept his voice light and hopeful, not wanting his love to have to worry about this anymore.

Carlos turned to James. How would he ever be able to live without him in his life? How was he ever to survive without James's love? Tears built up fast in Carlos's eyes, but he didn't turn away quick enough and James saw them.

"Hey now..." James soothed, grabbing Carlos's chin and turning it back towards him. He lowered his face a bit so they were staring into each others eyes, and whispered, "It's all going to be all right."

Unable to stop himself, Carlos launched himself against James's chest, sobbing gently into the black t-shirt. James rubbed circles along Carlos's back, completely unaware of the true origins of Carlos's sadness.

Wrapping his arms around the shorter boy tight, James said, "Everything will be okay baby. I promise it will be."

But Carlos only continued to weep, fear settling heavy in his heart...knowing that in reality, it might not be.

* * *

**xoxo BA **


	5. Meeting

"Gustavo...lovely to meet you! How are you today?" Helen asked as she walked into the elaborate mansion, unaffected and unfazed by it's wealth and beauty. Her tone spoke business and her face, though pleasant, bore the seriousness of the situation.

Gustavo leaned heavily against the door, his eyes dropping and red from lack of sleep. "Morning." He grumbled, shutting the door behind her.

"Hey!" Logan exclaimed as the door almost shut on him.

"Oh for heavens sakes!" Gustavo exclaimed when his eyes landed on the boy, then he stopped himself and looked over at Helen with a nervous chuckle. "I mean...sorry...uh...son!"

In an attempt to rectify his mistake, Gustavo grabbed Logan and pulled him in for a big hug. Unaware that this was about to happen, Logan waved his hands around and squeezed out, "Can't...breathe...!"

Finally the larger man let him go. Taking in deep breaths, Logan held his hand to his chest, never having experienced a hug with the man one on one. And he hoped he never would again.

Helen turned away from the two and pulled out a clipboard, walking around and firing questions to the older man.

Gustavo answered the best he could, taking advantage of her turned back to pull out some wet naps from his back pocket and wiping his hands vigorously with them.

"How is the security system?"

"Haven't had a break in yet." Gustavo answered with another chuckle, then sobered when Helen shot him an unamused look, "Uh...personal security code when you walk in and out. Gates all around the house. I even have a guard dog!"

"You're not talking about that ugly furless rat." Logan muttered to Gustavo under his breath, arms crossed as he looked around for the creature.

Glaring daggers at the boy, Gustavo shook his head, "No! I got a new pet...her name is Minnie."

"Minne? What kind of guard dog has a name like that?" Logan asked, expecting to see a slightly larger version of Gustavo's cat come flouncing out from somewhere.

As if in answer, Logan suddenly heard a low growl coming from behind him. He barely had enough time to turn when suddenly a large doberman pincher came running out from a hallway, leaping through the air and with a serious snarl, knocked Logan onto the ground.

"Heel Minnie! Let him go!" Gustavo yelled, to the large animal, waving his hands before reaching over and pulling the dog off the fallen boy. The dogs teeth were latched onto Logan's jeans, and when Gustavo finally ripped the creature off him, a loud rip echoed through the foyer. A large chunk of Logan's jeans were ripped off, just under the knee.

"Oh my gosh Logan! Are you okay?" Helen exclaimed, running over to the boy. He nodded, forcing a fake chuckle. "Um...does that happen often?" Helen asked as she walked over to Logan, offering him an arm to help him up. He swayed a bit, dazed, and latched onto the woman's arm to keep from falling. Her eyes narrowed disapprovingly at the larger man.

"Heh heh. Of course not! - here is just ancy cause he hasn't gone out yet." The pincher was currently tearing the fabric to pieces in his mouth, glaring up at Logan with hungry eyes.

Shaking his head, Logan finally let go of the woman before letting out a moan when he looked at his pants, "Mama Knight is gonna kill me!" He exclaimed out loud, grabbing onto his jeans.

"Mama Knight?" Helen asked, crossing her arms with a raised eyebrow.

"One of the other boys mother." Gustavo answered, ushering the group into the kitchen, "She looks after the other boys in the band, and previously Logan, before everything...uh...happened."

Inside the elaborate, and untouched, kitchen, Gustavo held out a hand towards the large island in the middle of the room. They had stools for them to sit in, and Logan eagerly climbed onto it for safety after the dog followed them into the room, fabric still hanging out of it's mouth.

"And that's the apartment we met at this morning?" Helen asked, taking a seat next to Logan and eying the guard dog dubiously as well. "She still takes care of you at times?"

Nodding, Logan answered, "Yeah. I mean...when Gustavo is away and stuff..."

"And does that happen often?" Helen asked, bringing out her clipboard and staring to write some things down.

Gustavo began to make some coffee as he answered, "Oh well no not so much. We work a lot in the studio and most everything I need to do I can get done here in L.A," He paused, placing his hand on the knob to the refrigerator, "Milk?"

"Please." Helen said, not looking up as she wrote. Logan tried to sneak a peak at her notes, but she caught him and gave him a warning stare...with a reassuring smile.

"And I can always send my assistant Kelly to get things done for me if I need it." Gustavo continued, opening the door. "She's very reliab-AHHHH!"

Both Logan and Helen looked up in time to see hordes of junk food fall out of the refrigerator, causing Gustavo to fall to the floor from the landslide of fudge, pizza boxes and hot pockets.

"Mr. Roque are you all right?" Helen exclaimed, jumping up to run over to the fallen man. "Oh my God...is that all junk food?"

"Gonna...kill...them..." Gustavo muttered to himself as he pulled off pizza slices and cans of Red Bull off his face and body, "Heh heh...I uh...like to stock up. You know how growing boys are." He tried to stand, but slipped and fell on bag of chips. "Insatiable...appetites." he squeaked out, face first on the floor.

"I don't see one healthy thing here!" Helen said as she opened up the fridge. She tskd in disappointment before moving over to the cabinets. "Potato chips, candy bars, cookies..." She continued to inspect the contents, not happy with what she was seeing.

In desperation, Logan reached into one of the cabinets and pulled out a box, "Fruit roll ups has fruit in it!"

Bringing her hand to her face, Helen shook her head, then looked up when Gustavo finally managed to stand up, knocking everything around generally making a huge mess.

"Um...how about I show you his room?" Gustavo asked, wincing when he took a step forward.

"Yes...how about we do that." Helen said miserably, turning to Logan who laughed nervously.

"This...way..." Gustavo squeaked out, taking baby steps while hunched over and keeping a firm hand on his back.

They slowly made their way out of the kitchen, heading down a hall that led to a set of stairs.

"He stays in the guest bedroom...on the second floor." Gustavo said in between painful gasps of air, pointing forward.

Helen nodded, looking around as they walked. But she suddenly stopped short when she turned to her left and saw an open doorway that led to a large gaming room.

"Well this is a nice set up." She said, walking into the room and inspect it's contents. At the far end was a large screen TV. Under the TV's stand was every gaming console available. On both sides of the TV held cases that displayed a huge selection of movies and games.

As she walked further into her room, she passed by a pool table and a large leather couch in front of the TV. With a wide smile, she turned back to Logan, "I'm sure you and your friends have had some great times here huh?"

Laughing nervously, Logan winced when Gustavo clamped his hand on his shoulder, squeezing hard, "Oh yeah...so much fun...you uh...you wouldn't believe it." He didn't need to be reminded of the time him and his friends house sat...those were some memories that weren't going away anytime soon.

Inspecting the room even more, Helen walked over to the games and movies. "Huh..." She began, then crouched own and began pulling out some of the cases.

"Is uh...something wrong?" Gustavo asked.

"A lot of these seem...rather violent...and...scary..." She held up the cases to Gustavo, showing him the covers and their...graphic cover art.

"Oh uh...a lot of those are mine!" Gustavo exclaimed shuffling into the room and grabbing the cases out of her hands, "I always make sure that sweet little Logan here isn't exposed to that kind of stuff. It would give him nightmares of course!" Laughing nervously, Gustavo leaned forward and loudly whispered, "He already wets the bed. Don't need to add to that!"

"Hey!" Logan exclaimed, hearing the older mans words, then crossed his arms angrily. "I do not-" He began, but Gustavo cut him off with a large hand over his mouth.

"Yes! Some days I just like to sit back and relax with a nice movie about uh..." He lifted up one of the cases with his free hand and winced, "teenage girls getting slashed to death by a maniacal teddy bear."

Gustavo gulped loudly when Helen stood up, glaring at him with her arms crossed. He took a step back, letting go of Logan to laugh nervously some more, and accidentally stepped on the TV remote that was laying on the floor. The sudden object under him made him gasp and slip, falling down again.

"Agh!" He yelled, sliding off the remote just as the TV turned on. As Gustavo tried to get up, he hit some more buttons, and eventually the TV settled onto a channel. Suddenly, the sounds of heavy moaning and skin slapping repeatedly against skin echoed in the room.

"Mr. Roque!" Helen shrieked as she turned to the TV, which was now displaying the intimate relations of two big breasted blond girls, then quickly turned away.

Grabbing the remote, Gustavo quick began pressing all the buttons to get the TV to turn off. "H-h-how did that get on there?"

Helen quickly walked over to Logan, who was staring at the screen with his head tilted to the side and a confused look on his face. She placed both of her hands over his eyes, and yelled at Gustavo, "Please turn that filth off!"

Finally the TV went black, and Gustavo turned to the furious woman with a nervous smile, "That uh must have been from my assistant...Kelly. I'll have a stern talking to her about-"

"Mr. Roque!" Helen yelled, taking her hands off the Logan's eyes and grabbed his arm. Logan looked dazed, and was blinking a bit from what he just saw. He was sure he was gay...but that was definitely not something he'd ever seen before...or could quite unsee.

"I'll have to admit I was expecting a bit more from you considering your high standing with the social service courts. You've had three boys stay here with you before, and according to their records they have all gone on to live successful and normal lives. _However_," She paused, taking a look at Logan, who was still glassy eyed, "I am very curious how that ever happened given what I've seen. And I most certainly will not take the chance of this boy being the one who doesn't make it out of this house hold alive."

"Wait!" Gustavo began, walking over to her, but then stopping when his back cracked and he bent over in pain, "I can explain." He wheezed, looking up at her with pleading eyes.

"I've seen enough." She jerked Logan by the arm and started walking out of the room, "Logan will be coming with me-"

Suddenly Logan seemed to break out of his spell, and finally acknowledge what was going on, "Wait!" He said, grabbing onto Helen's hand. "What's going on?"

Relieved to get some reaction from the boy Helen turned to him, but kept up her pace, "You're coming with me Logan. I can't in good conscience leave you here."

"No! Wait!" Logan exclaimed, "Please it's not his fault." He began to panic. What was going to happen to him? Was he going to a foster home? Was he never going to see his family again? Kendall again?

"Logan I promise I know what I'm doing-" Helen continued, still dragging the boy along.

"Just wait!" Logan yelled, jerking his arm out of Helen's grasp, earning him a confused stare from the woman. She crossed her arms, silent for a moment, then raised her eyebrows at him. "Yes?"

Breathing hard, Logan stared back, then hung his head for a minute, gathering his thoughts, before lifting it up gently, "Just wait...I-I'll explain...everything."

* * *

"If you wear a hole in the floor I'm taking it out of your allowance." Mama Knight said, looking up from the newspaper to her tall son. She was sitting at the kitchen table cutting out coupons, and turned to watch him pace back and forth behind the couch. Still on the orange couch was Katie and Carlos watching _Superbad_. James was in the shower.

"They've been gone for hours! Hours! Logan turned off his phone so I cant get in touch with him." He walked over to his mother, grasping her shoulders. "What if he needs me?" He tried to push down the panic rising up in his chest, but it was to strong.

"I'm sure he's fine." Carlos said from the couch, not even looking at Kendall when he spoke.

"But how can you know that?" Kendall shot back, turning to the Latino. "What if-"

But Carlos cut him off, standing quickly to shout, "He's a big boy Kendall. He doesn't need you to do everything for him. He can survive without you okay?"

Carlos took a deep breath, hating how everyone was now staring at him in surprise by his outburst.

"Carlos-" Mama Knight began, but the shorter boy just started walking towards the apartment door.

"I need air." He muttered as he walked past Kendall, throwing open the apartment door in an angry flourish.

He would have slammed it shut to prove his point, but when he opened the door, he came face to face with a dark skinned woman with blue eyes. She was holding up her hand as if to knock, but lowered it when she saw Carlos. Smiling at him, she opened her mouth to speak, but Carlos just brushed past her, not saying a word as he stomped down the hall.

"Oh I'm so sorry!" Mama Knight exclaimed, standing from the table to walk over to the door, "Can I help-" she continued, but Kendall suddenly appeared at her side.

"Where's Logan?" Kendall said, looking around Helen to see if his boyfriend was there. His panic rose again when he saw that he wasn't.

"I left Logan at Gustavo's." Helen answered Kendall before turning back to his mother, "Mama Knight I presume?" She said, nodding to the red haired woman as if to confirm this was her, smiling a bit at the nickname.

Nodding back, Mama Knight held the door open wider, "Yes. But you can call me Jennifer. Please, come in. And you are?"

"Thank you." Helen answered, walking into the apartment. She followed Mrs. Knight who held out a seat to her at the kitchen table. "I'm Helen, Logan's social worker today. I was assigned his case."

Nodding, Kendall's mother took in the information."Coffee?" she asked, but Helen shook her head.

"Ah no thanks. I wouldn't want anymore injuries." She smiled a bit at her own joke.

Confused, Mama Knight seemed like she was going to ask what that meant, but then saw Kendall putting on his Van's and jacket.

"Where are you going?" She asked her son.

"To Gustavo's. I can't stand it I need to talk to Logan." Kendall answered, already heading for the door.

"Hold it!" Mama Knight said, holding up a hand, "I don't think so. We have a mess to straighten out and I want you here to help me with it." She turned to the sitting woman and gave her a small smile, "No offense."

Shaking her head, Helen said, "None taken. But I agree. I think you and I should have a talk."

"Are you going to take Logan away?" Kendall shot at her. He didn't understand why she was here, or why they needed to talk. All he needed to know was Logan going to be here with him tonight...or not?

"I'm...not sure yet." Helen answered truthfully, taking out her manilla folder from her black bag and said, "I need to finish his home inspection."

Nervously, Kendall said, "What are you talking about? Gustavo's-" But stopped when the woman held out her own hand.

"Please honey. I've taken all the run around I can handle today." She turned to Mrs. Knight and continued, "Logan told me everything. You take care of him...let him live here. Gustavo is just his guardian in name...am I correct?"

Sighing, Mrs. Knight looked at Kendall, who was emphatically shaking his head no and waving his arms, then back at the woman. "Yes." Ignoring her son's cry of frustration, she continued, "I'm sorry for tricking social services...but it was the only thing we could think of to keep Logan with his family. His real family." She looked at the woman imploringly, "We've always been a close unit. Ever since they were little kids. They all love each other desperately, and after...what happened, well...there was no where else Logan was meant to be than with the people who loved him the most."

Nodding, Helen said, "All right...let's have a talk. Mother to mother...and see if we can't figure something out." She then pointed to Kendall, who had since been silently sneaking towards the apartment door, "Hold it."

He froze, caught.

"You go sit down on that couch until I'm ready for you." Helen instructed, pointing to the orange couch where Katie had been watching the scene with amusement.

Sighing and grumbling, Kendall walked over to the couch, flopping down with a huff and a pout.

Mama Knight and Helen watched him with small smiles, before Helen said, "Okay...I think I'll take that coffee now."

* * *

"I don't understand. Why are you still here? You told that woman everything...you can go home now." Gustavo whined to Logan, who was sitting on the guest bed, looking down at his hands.

"I can't go back...just yet." He muttered, not really wanting to talk about everything that just happened...and before that.

Sighing in aggravation, Gustavo huffed out, "Fine. I don't care if you spend the night. Just don't bother me. I'm going to call my private masseuse, get in my fabulous hot tub, then take a bunch of pills that will let me sleep until Monday. If you need anything...figure it out." Gustavo grumbled as he shuffled out of the room, hand still on his back. But before leaving, he stopped and turned back to the boy, "And don't even think about getting a repeat of what you saw earlier on TV. It took me a half hour, but I figured out parental controls!"

And with that good night, Gustavo slammed the door shut.

Heaving out a tired and heavy sigh, Logan flopped back on the bed before curling in on himself. This would be the first night in a long time that he would spend without Kendall. The last time he was without him was when...

When everything went wrong.

A part of him wished he could just call Kendall and talk to him, let the boy explain why he had kept this whole thing from him...but he was just so angry right now. It just wouldn't do any good. His phone had been turned off since he left that morning, and he didn't want to turn it on now and risk Kendall calling or texting him. He didn't trust himself not to answer.

Instead he got up and walked over to the door, opening it slowly to make sure Gustavo wasn't nearby. Quietly he walked through the house, finally stopping at the kitchen. The mess was still all over the floor and the refrigerator door still open. He took his time and began picking everything up, trying to talk himself out of what he already knew he was going to do.

After about forty five minutes he finally had the kitchen looking clean again. With a new found determination, he walked over to the wall that held a land line phone. Taking three deep breaths, he picked up the phone, and dialed a number he had been required to learn by heart.

After three rings, each of which Logan almost hung up, finally there was an answer.

"Hello...Dr. Mira? Yes...No! No I'm all right. I-uh-I actually wanted to talk to you about...what we had been talking about earlier...yes...that."

* * *

"What do you mean he's not coming home?" Kendall nearly shrieked, watching Helen as she stood from the Kitchen table and began gathering her papers and folders.

"He's staying with his legal guardian tonight until I can make a decision as to where we go from here." Helen answered, but she hadn't forgotten the look in Logan's eyes when she asked if he wanted to go back to the hotel, and how he shook his head and asked to remain at Gustavo's. She knew something else was going on, and whatever it was, he didn't want to come back to this apartment.

"But...But..." Kendall began, but his mother walked over and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, "It's fine Kendall. We'll go get him in the morning."

With a defeated sigh, Kendall nodded and watched Helen as she shook hands with his mother and left. In despair, he left the room to head to his and Logan's bedroom, flopping on the couch with a moan.

"I'm sorry Logan." He muttered into the pillow before turning on his side, grabbing Logan's own pillow and holding it close, as if he were hugging the boy. "I'll fix this. I promise."

* * *

**xoxo BA**


	6. Making Up

**I want to start off by saying thank you to everyone who supported me with what had been going on with my **_**Meet the Warblers**_** story. If you aren't familiar with the recent changes, and are a reader of **_**Meet the Warblers**_**, please check out Chapter 8 of that story, and it will explain to you what the Peacekeepers of are forcing me to do. But to those of you who do know, you are all so amazingly awesome and I thank you a million times for your kind words and constant support! I love you all!**

* * *

James was getting worried. When he emerged from his room Katie had informed him that Carlos left a while ago to go on a walk. So far he hadn't returned and it was getting late. He'd sent him multiple texts and phone calls, but hadn't heard back from the Latino yet.

He couldn't concentrate he was so worried. A big part of him wanted to just get up and go out to find him, but he was worried they'd cross paths and Carlos would come home to find him gone.

James was sitting on the orange couch alone, everyone had already gone to bed ages ago. He had the TV on but it was muted, leaving him lost in his thoughts.

What was up with Carlos? He thought that he was just upset with what was going on with Logan...but now he was beginning to suspect it was something more.

Interrupting his thoughts was the sound of the apartment door opening. Jumping up, James saw Carlo's form illuminated in the light from the hallway.

"There you are!" James exclaimed, walking over to his lover. James's frown deepened even more when he saw how tired and haggard Carlos looked.

"Are you all right?" James asked, wrapping his long arms around the shorter boy. He felt Carlos tense under him, and barely return the hug.

"Baby whats wrong?" James asked, pulling away but holding onto Carlos shoulders. He stared into the tired eyes of the one he loved, desperately seeking some answers.

But Carlos shook his head, "M'just tired James." He croaked out, his voice rough and void of his usual cheer. He looked back at James with sad, pleading eyes, "Can we just go to bed?"

A part of James wanted to fight this. To pull the boy to the couch and force out of him the answers to the sadness in his eyes.

But...he didn't. Carlos looked like he was about to topple over, so instead James linked fingers with him, tugging him towards their room.

"Okay." He whispered, and headed towards their bedroom. Questions unanswered...for now.

* * *

Carlos was in the throes of a nightmare. James was sitting around the fire pit down by the pool, surrounded by a harem of beautiful girls. They were all laughing and hanging onto every word that he said.

The Latino watched, desperately wanting to say something...but he didn't. Instead he could only watch and James continued to talk and laugh with the girls...never noticing Carlos was right there.

Crying.

_Carlos?_

Dying.

_Carlos._

...Accepting

_Carlos!_

The little Latino woke with a start, and was met face to face with the chocolate eyes of his best friend Logan.

"Dude...wha-?" Carlos answered, his mind swirling with the images slowly fading from his memories as his throat was clogged with sleep.

"Get up. I need to talk to you." Logan whispered. "Meet me at one of the cabana's in ten minuets okay?"

And then he was gone in a flash. Carlos blinked once...then twice before turning around in his bed. Empty. He assumed James was at the gym, where he often went in the morning. Normally he felt it when James left the bed, but he must have been dead to the world this morning.

It made sense. He felt so tired lately, having been heaving around the ugly thoughts of him and James breaking up, and trying to understand what was going on with Logan.

Swinging his legs off the bed, he sighed again, and then got ready for the day as fast as he could in the allotted time he was given.

Finally he stepped into the kitchen, and saw Mamma Knight making some coffee.

"Morning." She yawned, then offered him a muffin from a tray she had set out.

He waved it off, his appetite nonexistent at the moment. "No thanks."

She noticed his jeans and t-shirt and said, "Are you going somewhere? Kendall and I were going to leave soon to go get Logan...did you want to come?"

Carlos blinked a couple of times, then realized that they had no idea Logan was back. "Uh...no that's okay. I'll catch up with him later. I've gotta go...I'll be back in a while okay?"

His surrogate mother nodded, but set her mug down with a concerned look settling in her eyes, "Carlos...if something is bothering you...you know you can always talk to me right?"

He nodded, "Thanks Mama Knight. I'll be back later." Then turned and left the apartment. He did want to talk, but he wasn't sure what good it would do. Who he really needed to talk to was Logan

Speaking of which, Carlos found Logan in one of the green cabanas, just where he said he would be.

"Dude...six in the morning...really?" Carlos groaned closing the cabana behind him.

Logan rolled his eyes, kicking a seat over to his friend, motioning him to sit across him where he was sitting.

"How come Mama Knight and Kendall don't know you're back yet?" Carlos asked sitting down, "They're going to leave soon to go to Gustavo's to get you."

Sighing, Logan shook his head, "I know. I'll text them soon to let them know I'm going to get a ride. I just...I'm not ready to go back yet." He placed his hands on his face, "I just don't know what to _do_ yet."

"About what?" Carlos asked, looking at his friend.

Logan pulled his hands away and looked at the ground, not answering.

But suddenly it clicked, and Carlos didn't need an answer.

"No." Carlos exclaimed, jumping up. "No. Logan. No. There is no way you can do this. You cannot...CANNOT break up with Kendall. James and I might not stand a chance but you and Kendall...you can't do it to him. He loves you _so_ much." Carlos continued rambling, pacing the cabana back and forth. He finally stopped and got into Logan's face, "After everything you two have been through you're just going to throw it all away for a 'what if?"

Pushing the boy away, Logan looked up at him, "It's more than that Carlos. It's complicated..."

Sighing, Carlos squatted down, placing his hands on Logan's shoulders, "Logan. If you really thought breaking up with Kendall was the best idea...you would have done it by now."

Logan opened his mouth to retort, but only a slight croaking sound came out, and he hung his head again.

"Where are you getting these ideas anyways?" Carlos asked, standing up to grab a chair and pull it closer to Logan. He was surprised when Logan actually had an answer.

Letting out a sigh, Logan answered, "Dr. Mira. She and I have been talking about...how it's important for me to learn how to deal with things on my own. To be...independent." He shook his head, "She's worried that I rely on Kendall to much."

"That's ridiculous." Carlos said, but Logan shook his head again, standing up.

"It's not though. This whole thing just totally...threw me. I had no clue as to what was going on because I trusted you all so much. But you were lying to me," Carlos frowned and looked at the ground with guilt, "and in the end I had to stand on my own and get through this whole thing blind. It...it just can't be like that." Logan shook his head, feeling bad for Carlo's guilt. He knew his friends well enough that Kendall must have made them promise their silence, but still...he needed them to know that when it came to things like this, they _had_ to be honest with him.

Logan continued, "And...I have you guys yeah...but for how long? Soon we'll be going off in our own directions...but what if things don't work out and we need help? You have your parents, James has his mom, Kendall has his family." He turned back to Carlos with pleading eyes, "What do I have?"

"Us!" Carlos exclaimed from his seat. "And especially Kendall."

"I can't live like that Carlos. We're in love yes, but love...fades...it goes away and get's replaced sometimes." Logan said, "I can't take that chance. I have to be ready for anything-"

"No ones ready for everything." Carlos shot back, his panic rising. "Please. Don't make any decisions until you talk to Kendall. Please. I know this is "logical" Logan fighting with "in love with Kendall" Logan, but you can't base this decision on whats up here." Carlos said, standing and placing a finger on Logan's head, "But here." He then moved the finger down to Logan's heart. It was ridiculously cheesy, Carlos knew, but he also knew that Logan needed cheesy sometimes in his life.

The smart boy heaved a sigh and nodded, "Okay...I'll talk to Kendall first. But I'm not making any promises." Logan said, but was relieved inside that he had talked with Carlos. His friend was right...he was thinking this through more with his head than with his heart. He loved Kendall, and as much as his mind was telling him he needed to take care of himself...his heart was battling fiercely that he could learn to do so _and_ keep Kendall.

"Please...one look at those green eyes and you'll be a goner." Carlos said, wrapping an arm around Logan and pulling him in for a hug.

Logan relaxed against his friend for a moment, then pulled back, giving him a little shove, "Whatever...and what was that about you and James not making it? What kind of ridiculousness is that?"

Shoving his hands into his pockets, Carlos sighed and looked down, "Well since we're being all honest and having a girly heart to heart...honestly Logan...you know it's true. James and me...I love him. I love him so much. But...he's to good for me-ow!" Carlos shouted, grabbing his arm and rubbing the now forming bruise from where Logan punched him.

"Carlos Geraldo Garcia! Don't you ever think someone is too good for you. If you and James aren't meant to be then it'll be for a different reason that James Diamond being to _good_ for you. Don't let me ever hear you talk about yourself like that again!" Logan shouted at Carlos, pushing the boy back with a pointed finger until he fell into the seat behind him. Carlos looked up and gaped at Logan's outburst, not used to seeing the boy fume angrily like that.

"But he's destined for stardom! He's going to meet celebrities and models and a million other people I'll never be able to compete with-OW! LOGAN!" Carlos yelled, glaring at his friend again as he received another punch.

"Over my dead body will you break up with James because your insecure. Talk to him if you really are feeling this way...but don't ever think of yourself like that." Logan said, and suddenly his voice went very soft, "You are so amazing Carlos. Don't ever put yourself down."

Carlos sighed and shook his head, "It seems like the both of us have stuff to work on huh?"

Mirroring his sigh, Logan nodded, rubbing the palms of his hands against his face, "When will things ever be normal again?"

Laughing, Carlos stood, "I don't think normal is in the cards for us for a while."

Logan only whined in response.

* * *

From the left side of the outside of the Cabana, partially hidden, James watched as Carlos opened the flap and call back inside, "Don't make any rash decisions okay? I'll talk to you soon." Then he closed the flap and started to head towards the lobby doors alone, unaware that James was watching his every move.

Stunned at what he just heard, James slid his work out bag off his shoulder and opened up one of the pockets. He pulled out his phone, and sent a quick text to Kendall.

_We need to talk. Now. _

* * *

Logan sighed as he stood outside the door to the apartment, procrastinating from entering. He was just so confused. He'd long ago sent Kendall a text telling him he was on his way home...but he just couldn't face him...not yet.

He loved Kendall. A million times over he loved him...but his mind was constantly fighting him, replaying Dr. Mira's words from last night over and over again.

"_I think it would be entirely beneficial for you to terminate the relationship Logan."_

_His heart literally stopped at hearing those words. The large kitchen in Gustavo's home spun as he grabbed the phone. "Y-you do?"_

"_You have so many other things you should be focusing on Logan. School, a career, your future. I honestly believe that you are using your relationship with Kendall as a crutch from facing the realities of your situation." Her voice bore no hesitation as she spoke. There was no doubt...no other options._

"_But-" Logan had to try, he just couldn't...not be with Kendall. "But I can try harder-" yet she cut of his words with a sigh._

"_Logan you've already tried with Kendall. And look where that's gotten you? Who knows whats going to happen tomorrow...what social services will do. Kendall wasn't honest with you...in fact he was downright deceitful. How will you have any sort of happy future if you have someone like that in your life?"_

_The room spun again and he had to put a hand out and press it against the wall, then lean heavily on it to keep from toppling over._

"_Think about it Logan. It's for the best. I know it, and I think you know it to."_

After she hung up Logan had leaned his back against the wall, then slid down to the cold floor, dropping the phone and wrapping his arms around his legs, weeping quietly in the dark for what seemed like all night.

Could he do it? Could he really let Kendall go?

He thought about everything they'd been through. Dancing around each other for years before finally admitting what they'd been hiding for so long. Their first date, their first kiss...their first everything.

And then the misery that was loosing his parents. Kendall found him when he was lost and alone. He saved him, gave him a home and love and as much protection as he could.

So then...should one mistake really top all the things Kendall has done _right_?

Before he could answer that himself, the apartment door swung open, revealing James.

"Oh...hey." Logan said, blinking as he was pulled out of his thoughts.

James just stared at him for a moment, remaining silent.

"Um...can I come in?" Logan asked, frowning when his friend continued to stay silent and blocking the door with his large frame.

Suddenly James reached out, then pulled Logan in for a tight embrace. Stunned, Logan slowly lifted his hands, placing them on James back with an awkward pat. "Um...you okay?"

Pulling back, James kept his hands on Logan's arms and seriously said, "You're family okay? We're family. We love you. I love you. And you are _not_ alone."

Blinking in shock at James, Logan's mouth opened and closed a couple of times before he finally managed to squeak out, "Thanks."

Nodding awkwardly, James let go of Logan, then said, "Good. Mamma Knights out with Katie. She'll be back in a while. I've got to meet Carlos in the park." He paused and jerked a thumb back towards the inside, "Kendall's in there. You two have the place to yourselves."

With another exchange of nods, James walked away. Logan sighed again, glanced at James retreating back, silently questioning his odd behavior, then stepped inside.

He quietly shut the door behind him and looked around. No sign of his lover. Since the shower wasn't running, Logan could only assume that he was in their bedroom.

Slowly he walked to his room, trying to go over in his head what he should do. It helped that he talked to Carlos this morning, he needed another persons point of view before deciding anything.

Not that he really decided anything yet...but it helped.

Finally he got to his door, and then opened it.

Kendall was sitting on his bed, hands folded, doing nothing. Frowning on confusion, Logan shut the door behind him, then tentatively said, "Um...Kendall?"

The blond turned to him, Logan almost shrunk when he saw the look in his eyes. Each orb held so much anger in them...as well as sadness.

"Ken-" Logan began, but the blond suddenly spoke, his voice fierce.

"No."

Logan froze for a moment, standing by the door. "N-no what?" He barely managed to whisper.

"No to everything. No you're not leaving. No you're not alone. And no," here he paused, sucking in a painful breath, "we're not breaking up."

It literally felt like the wind had been knocked out of his lungs, Logan nearly fell over as he squeaked out, "W-what?"

"James overheard you and Carlos this morning." Kendall said before shaking his head with a scoff, "He's got his own problems now with Carlos, and it's up to them how they fix them, but you and I are fixing this right now." He tried to keep his voice even, he didn't want to scare Logan, but truthfully he was furious. Once again, Logan went to everyone else in the world with his problems except for _him_. Kendall knew that this was something they were going to have to rectify in their relationship soon if they were going to stand any chance of making it in the future.

Logan felt the room tilt a bit. James overheard? Everything? Well, their previous exchange made a lot of sense now.

Kendall stood and walked over to Logan, the anger still ablaze on his features. "I don't care what your shrink says, it's bullshit and you know it."

"Ken-" Logan tried again, but winced when Kendall shoved his hands against the door to their room, pinning his palms to the wood so that they blocked both sides of Logan's head...trapping him with a loud smack.

"Is that really what you want?" Kendall breathed out quietly to his trembling love, "Do you really want us to...just end things because you don't know what's going to happen in the future?" He paused, letting out a humorless chuckle, "Newsflash Logan. No one knows what's going to happen in the future!" He knew he was loosing his temper fast, and had to reel it in if he didn't want this to end poorly.

Logan chanced a look up at Kendall, and immediately wished he hadn't. His anger fueled green eyes were mere inches from him, and Logan could feel the rage permeating through Kendall's body heat like a furnace.

"I'm not letting you go Logan. Not unless you have a damn good reason for it." Kendall whispered, moving his hands so that they were now cupping Logan's face, keeping their eye contact. "Give me a good reason Logan. Please. I want to hear it." He was nearly snarling his words.

Playing with fire, Logan burst out, "You lied to me Kendall. About something incredibly important. You made me feel like an idiot and...and I don't know whats going to happen now."

Letting go of Logan's face, Kendall dropped his hands to his side, "I'm sorry for that Logan. I really am. I would have told you that million times if I had been with you." He wanted to reach for Logan again, but kept his hands at bay, knowing things were still rocky, "But please don't end this because of one mistake. I can't promise I'll never make another one, but-" he swallowed, the emotion from all of this to much for him to handle, "but I can't loose you Logan. And...I don't think...no I _know_ you don't want to loose me either."

Logan had a million things he could say to Kendall. A million reasons why they should just end things right now. Right this _second_. It could save them a lifetime of sadness and mistakes...

But his resolve crumbled fast because, he knew inside, that he had just as many...if not more...reasons why leaving Kendall would he the worst idea in his life.

"I'm still mad at you." Logan said, then threw himself into Kendall's arms, kissing him fully on the lips as he wrapped his own arms around the blonds neck.

Kendall had no words back at him. He just wrapped his arms around Logan to return the kiss...with every intention of never letting him go.

* * *

**xoxo BA **


	7. Misgivings

It had begun to rain at some point, but both boys ignored the downpour outside. They were to busy being wrapped up in each others arms, contemplating how close they had gotten to almost loosing something that mattered so much to them.

Lying in bed, Logan had his head resting on Kendall's chest, the steady heart beat a quiet solace in his ear.

"Where do we go from here?" Kendall asked in a whisper. He didn't want to break the silence, but he knew they would have to face this question at some point.

Sighing, Logan shook his head. He was just so tired. He barely slept at all the past two nights, and he just wanted to fall asleep and wake up with everything magically fixed.

Unfortunately, that wasn't how things worked.

Lifting his head, he shifted so he was sitting on the bed, facing Kendall. The blond reached out and laced their fingers together, using this movement to show Logan that he wasn't going anywhere.

The smart boy squeezed his boyfriend's hand tight, "We have to have a serious discussion about our future Kendall. We're not kids anymore, and the future is coming at us...fast. I want to be with you for as long as you'll have me...but...we have to be realistic if we want this to work. We have to sit down and...I don't know...make a list or something. Figure out what we both want."

"What if all I want is you?" Kendall asked, and even though Logan gave him his side smirk and blushed gently, Kendall's face remained still and serious.

"Kendall..." Logan began, but the blond shook his head.

"No matter where you go...what you do. All I want from life is to just be by your side and sharing every moment with you. Good...bad...whatever I don't care. I just want to be there."

Logan's throat closed with emotion at Kendall's words, and he shook his head, not sure what to say. Silence stretched on in the room for a small while, until Logan shakily answered, "Is it selfish of me to want that from you as well?"

Laughing gently, Kendall leaned forward and gathered Logan in his arms with a small laugh, "Yes. It's terrible of you to want the love of your life to spend every day with you." His sarcasm was not lost on the small boy in his arms as he continued to situate him on his lap.

Squeezing Kendall hard, he looked up into those green eyes he loved and answered, "I want that with you too. I want to spend every day with you. Be wherever you are." He took a deep breath, knowing what he was saying next was a big leap, "I trust you enough that I know you won't stop me from living out my dreams...I just don't want to be the obstacle standing in the way of yours."

Running his knuckles softly against Logan pale cheek, Kendall smiled, "I don't see how that's possible...since most of my dreams consist of you and whip cream...some handcuffs..." He stopped when Logan gently swatted his stomach, giggling and rolling his eyes at the blond and his dirty mind.

"I'm serious Kendall." Logan said, taking Kendall's hand in his, "We have to figure out what's next for us. We have to be prepared for the possibility that...well that our futures may take us in two separate directions. Now matter how much we love each other, from now on we have to be honest about everything. Everything that's important." He sighed and looked away, "I'm not going to let you give up on anything you want in life because you're afraid of loosing me." He looked back at Kendall, fierce determination in his eyes, "I wont."

Kendall couldn't believe how much he loved this boy in his lap. Despite Logan's words, Kendall had no intention of ever letting their relationship ever get to that point. No matter what direction they were destined to go in, Kendall was sure they would make it work so that they could be together. But he would let Logan have what he wanted now. "I know baby. I know." He placed a kiss on his loves forehead before continuing, "Why don't you get some rest, and later tonight we'll make that list and talk about what we both want to do okay?" He would go through the motions with Logan, but no matter what the outcome, Kendall wasn't letting Logan go.

Though he wanted to continue, Logan couldn't help himself. His eyes were dropping, and it had been so long since he had been in Kendall's warm, comfortable embrace. Nodding in agreement, Logan kicked off his shoes and settled under the covers with Kendall.

"No matter what happens," Logan began sleepily as he looked up at Kendall, "I love you so much."

A small gasp escaped from Kendall, and with a fierce kiss to Logan's pink lips, Kendall pulled back and whispered, "Oh Logan...I love you too." _So much. So fucking much_.

Before long Logan's breaths evened out and it was evident to the still wide awake Kendall that Logan was fast asleep.

Slowly, Kendall extracted himself from the bed, staring down at the sleeping boy he loved. Leaning over, Kendall placed a small kiss on his forehead, then turned and walked over to their desk. He grabbed a pen and piece of paper before quickly scrawling out a message. He walked back over to the nightstand and left the folded paper on it. "I'll be back." He whispered, then slipped out the door.

* * *

Carlos stared up at the sky from his spot the on the grass he was laying on. Though it was still relatively early in the morning, the Palm Woods Park was still abuzz with constant activity from locals jogging, meeting up for coffee or just enjoying the nice sunny day.

However, Carlos couldn't share in the enthusiasm. His mind was whirling with thoughts from his and Logan's discussion earlier this morning. Would Logan really break up with Kendall? Should he just break up with James now and save himself the heartache that would inevitably come later down the road?

He sighed again, shaking his head of the thoughts plaguing him. He didn't know what to do...what to think.

"Carlos?" Blinking, Carlos turned to his side and saw Cori standing over him.

"Oh...hey." He said, sitting up with a frown. She was the last person he wanted to see.

"Hey! I was just wondering if you saw James around?" She asked, twirling her dark curly hair on one finger.

"Um..." Carlos started. He was supposed to meet with James here. His boyfriend had sent him a text asking him to a little while ago. But he didn't want to tell her that. Yet, he still felt bad about the other day when he scared her.

Standing, Carlos said, "Yeah. Well...no I haven't seen him. But he should be here any second." Taking a deep sigh and swallowing a big heaping of his pride, he chocked out, "And...and I'm sorry about the other day, for scaring you. That was really rude of me."

Flashing him a bright smile, she shook her head, "No worries! It was an accident. But thanks anyways!"

Groaning internally at how nice she was, Carlos felt even worse about his actions. However he was saved from suffering any more guilt when James suddenly came up beside them, an eyebrow raised at the appearance of the girl.

"Hey Cori." James said when he saw her, "Whats up?"

"Hey James! I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out today?" She asked, hope evident in her face and voice.

To Carlos's ultimate surprise, he suddenly felt his hand being grabbed, and turned to James with complete shock.

"Thanks for the offer Cori," James began with a smile, "But I promised my boyfriend I would spend the day with him."

Her mouth fell open with surprise, mirroring Carlos who was also a bit flabbergasted. "Oh...um...I-I didn't...oh okay. I-I've got to-" She stumbled back, looking back and forth between the two before turning bright red and walking away as James waved good bye to her.

"So!" James exclaimed, turning to Carlos with a wide smile, "What would you like to do today? It's ridiculously gorgeous out. Mini golf? A walk? Oh we could go to the beach-?" But his words were soon cut off.

"What was that?" Carlos asked, frowning as he shook his hand out of James's hold to cross his arms.

"What was what?" James asked back, pouting at the loss of Carlo's touch.

Carlos threw his hands up in the air, exclaiming, "You...you blew off Cori so you could hang out with me!"

Blinking in confusing, James answered, "And...that's weird...because...?"

"Because you like her!" Carlos shot back, his own confusion evident.

"Yeah...I mean she's nice...but...I want to be with you." James answered, walking up close to the boy and wrapping his hand around the back to Carlos's head, holding it still. "I want to spend all day with you. I barely got to see you yesterday." He left the meaning to the words hanging, not saying out loud that he knew something was up.

Carlos flushed a bit, knowing that James was suspicious, but having no idea that James actually knew more than he was letting on.

"S-sorry..." Carlos whispered, his knees going a little weak at having James so close.

Flashing him his trademark diamond smile, James said, "No sorry's. Not to me. Ever." Then closed the distance between them, giving his Latino love a long, chaste kiss.

Carlos melted into James's touch, feeling like it had been years since he had been close to the boy. He wanted to just open up to James about everything. His fears...what was going on with Logan. But, he was so afraid of loosing him. What if James agreed that they should end things now? What if he really was into Cori. A myriad of fears flashed through Carlos's mind, and wouldn't let go.

Eventually James stepped back, but was disappointed to see that Carlos was still holding fear in his eyes. Determined to continue on with his plan, James grabbed Carlos's hand again and said, "C'mon. Let's start the day."

Nodding, Carlos followed James, wondering how he was ever going to survive without this boy in his life?

* * *

"Dr. Mira? I'm sorry to interrupt, but there's a boy out here who is insisting on seeing you."

Looking up from her papers on her desk, Dr. Mira turned to the desk phone and pressed a button to answer back on the speaker, "Is it Logan?" She hadn't heard from him yet, and had to admit she was a bit worried.

"No. It's not one of your patients. But it's in regard to Mr. Mitchell." Her secretary answered.

Letting out a sigh, Dr. Mira already knew who it was. Nodding, she answered back, "That's all right. Let him in."

"Okay. But just to remind you, your next appointment is in fifteen."

"Thank you." Dr. Mira stood and walked over to her couch, taking a seat. In less than a minute later there was a knock at her office door. "Come in." She called out, and wasn't surprised to see Kendall Knight walk into the room.

"Hello Mr. Knight." She said, standing and walking over to the boy. They shook hands and she gestured to the couch, "It's lovely to see you again. I hope you are doing well?" She asked, taking a seat across from him.

"No. I'm doing better than I was...but I'm not doing too well at this moment." Kendall answered truthfully, his voice quiet and heavy.

Dr. Mira nodded, "And I assume this has to do with Logan?"

Nodding, Kendall looked down at his hands.

Her heart went out to the boy, to both of them, "Kendall...I know that what you're going through right now is difficult. Break ups can be heart-wrenching. But Logan needs to focus on his future, on learning how to stand on his own without having a fall back plan."

Kendall was silent for a moment, staring at the woman, before he spoke again, "So...that's your great advice. Dump everyone who means something to him so that he can learn to be strong on his own?"

Shaking her head, Dr, Mira answered, "Kendall you are much to young to understand-" But he cut her off, anger evident in his voice.

"No...I understand. I understand...that Logan is now pretty much an orphan. Whose parents practically gave him to a crazy man so that they could...destroy him. And now the only people in the world who can help him...who love him and _want_ to help him...should be considered as nothing more than road blocks to some kind of successful but incredibly lonely future?" Kendall looked up at the woman, "How functional does that sound?"

"Logan cannot learn how to stand on his own when his fall backs are so tentative." Dr. Mira argued.

"How is having a family who loves him tentative." Kendall asked, disbelief lacing his voice.

"Kendall," Dr. Mira continued, "His 'family' is tied only to feelings so long as they last. There has to be more of a foundation than romantic tendencies."

"We're not breaking up." Kendall answered back with fierce determination. "We love each other to much. That's as good a foundation as any."

"No?" Dr. Mira said, surprised. She was sure Logan was going to do so...Kendall must have made him change his mind. With a sigh, she knew she had to do what Logan wasn't strong enough to do for himself.

"Kendall...let's say you two decide to stick it out...what happens if one of you cheats on the other?"

"Not happening." Kendall stubbornly relied, crossing his arms.

"But let's say Logan get's drunk one night and makes a huge mistake. Would you forgive him...? Let him back into your," she held up her hands so she could do air quotes, "family? If he did that to you?"

"Yes." Kendall said, without hesitation. It killed him to say so, the thought of Logan being with someone else tore greatly at his heart, but he loved Logan so much. He would take him back. He knew it without a doubt. It would be a long...hard road...but if Logan wanted his forgiveness he would give it to him.

Surprised at his answer, though she didn't let it show, Dr. Mira continued, "And what about you? What if you cheated on him-"

"I would never do that to him." Kendall nearly shouted at the woman, but she continued on.

"What if you did that to him? Or met someone new. Or if there was an accident and, God forbid, you died? How would Logan handle that? How would he survived that?"

Kendall shook his head, "Logan survived loosing his parents."

"Because he had you, and your friends and their family for support. People change Kendall. They grow and separate and go their own ways. I just don't want to see Logan stuck in a place where he can't do the same, because he's to afraid of what that change will bring."

But Kendall wasn't having any of it. No matter what she said, he wouldn't change his mind, "Logan's stronger than you know. He's smarter than all of us, and you should have more faith in him."

Dr. Mira sighed at Kendall's stubbornness, underestimating how tough this would be, "And if you truly cared about him, you wouldn't hold him back."

Standing, unable to listen to her anymore, Kendall said, "I would never hold Logan back from anything. If...," he stopped for a moment, the thought breaking his heart, "If Logan wanted to leave me...fine. If he wanted to go away to school to become a doctor fine. If he wanted to run away and join the circus as a lion tamer...fine. I don't care. I just want him in my life."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair, "I know you think we're to young. To naïve about the world to understand what we're doing...but we're in love. And, despite what you think, what you've seen, that's what's got Logan tied to me forever. He's my boyfriend, yes, but before that he was my best friend, and even my brother. That hasn't changed. It never will."

Dr. Mira was silent when Kendall spoke. She admired his passion and commitment to Logan, but she was familiar with young love, and it's tendencies to lead people down thorny paths.

"Think about what we've talk about today." Dr. Mira said, standing as well, "I'm afraid I have another patient waiting."

Nodding, Kendall turned and started to leave the office, but he turned back and said, "I know what you think Dr. Mira...and you know what I think. But, when it comes down to it...all that really matters is what Logan thinks."

She nodded, and watched him leave.

* * *

The sound of heavy knocking drew Logan out of his deep sleep. He moaned quietly, then after he opened his eyes he blinked a bit at the realization that he was alone in bed. He glanced at the clock and saw it was only about a half an hour since he laid down with Kendall. Not much time to get some rest.

"Kendall?" He croaked out as the sound of the heavy banging started again, coming from the apartments front door. He saw the note on the bedside table, and grabbed it as he slid of the bed and walked out of the room.

_Logie, _

_Ran out for a bit. I will be back soon._

_Love you,_

_Your Knight in shinning armor. _

Smiling, Logan folded the paper and put it into his pocket, walking down the hallway to the front door, the banging continuing.

He recognized the banging, and assumed it was Gustavo, coming over to be angry and complain about something. Sighing, he ran a mental check list from yesterday, wondering if he had made a mess of something and forgot to pick it up...but he couldn't think of anything. That meant that at least there was the possibility of all four of them being in trouble, as opposed to just him.

Wincing at another series of bangs, Logan finally got to the door, then opened it slowly, expecting to see the large man with his angry face on.

Instead, the air left Logan's lungs as he felt like he had just been punched in the gut. He managed to squeak out and quiet, but full of fear, "Dad?"

* * *

**xoxo BA**


	8. Madness

Thank you so much for all your reviews! They are so amazing and sweet I really enjoy writing this story for you. Sorry for leaving you all with a cliffhanger! And I promise I will be updating my other stories soon! Sorry for the delay.

* * *

Something was up with James. Something...but Carlos could not figure out what.

Granted, Carlos had to admit he was a bit spoiled in his relationship with James. The boy was always sweet and nice to him, but they could still maintain their silly bro-based friendship that entitled epic video game battles and fierce wrestling matches.

Just those wrestling matches now ended in make out sessions.

But today James seemed to be in full-on boyfriend mode...to the extreme.

Since meeting in the park, James took Carlos on a long walk, basking in the sunny day. He bought him a corn dog, then an ice cream cone. After a while the sky darkened, so James took Carlos to a nearby gazebo and they both sat on the steps, waiting for the rain to come.

While they had never had trouble holding a conversation before, Carlos had to admit that James was listening just a little to intently, and asking a lot more questions than usual.

"Did you enjoy the walk?" James said, sitting close next to Carlos and grasping his hand tight. He hadn't let go since they began this morning.

"Yeah-" Carlos answered, but then James quickly continued.

"It was such a nice day. And I know how you love the park. You should bring your painting supplies out here one day. I'm sure it's such a nice place to paint-."

But Carlos couldn't stand it anymore. Something was off. Something wasn't right. He was all to familiar with keeping secrets himself, he could spot someone else hiding something a mile off. Especially when it was someone he knew as well as his boyfriend.

"Okay James. Give it up. I know somethings up." Carlos said, finally freeing his arm so he could cross them, glaring at James, "I can just tell you are up to something."

"What?" James said, although failing at acting like he was seriously surprised. He was the worst liar out of the whole group, and everyone knew it, "I have no clue what you are talking about." He tried to grasp Carlos's hand again, but the Latino kept it close.

"No James. Somethings off with you." Carlos continued.

"What do you mean?" James said with a frown.

"This morning...with Cori. And this walk. And just...the way you've been acting." The shorter said, holding his hands so he could tick each reason off on his fingers, "What's going on?"

Sighing, James shook his head and said, "Am I really that bad of a boyfriend?"

Jerking back at James's words, Carlos exclaimed, "What? No. Of course not! Where did you get that idea?"

Standing in frustration, James shot back, "You're surprised that I want to spend time with you. That I'd rather hang out with you, my _boyfriend_, than some random girl." He stood, walking away from Carlos and further into the Gazebo, pacing back and forth as he continued to speak, "And just going on a nice walk and having me pay attention to you...that calls for something to be off?" He shook his head, running a hand through his hair, which was a clear sign he was upset, "I-I'm really sorry Carlos-" But Carlos had jumped up and followed James, reaching the boy to place the tips of his fingers on James's lips to silence him, and the other hand to grab James's wrist to keep him from turning away.

"No. I'm sorry. You're right...it shouldn't be weird. That's my fault. I guess...I've just been off these past couple of days." Carlos removed his fingers and placed them on James's chest, loving the solidity of what he touched, "You are a great boyfriend. An amazing one. I'm just taking you for granted. Please...I'm sorry."

James sighed, and slid his hands up to cup Carlos's face. He was silent for a moment, then said quietly, "You know I love you right?"

Carlos nodded, smiling, "I love you to."

But that didn't satisfy James, because he knew more than Carlos realized. "But do you really know? Do you really know how much I love you?"

Carlos was silent for a moment, then said, "I know you love me." _Now_.

Suddenly thunder clapped hard, causing both boys to jerk. Carlos stepped closer to James just as the rain began to pour down around them.

"Don't see storms like this often around here." James said, wrapping his arms tight around Carlos, who snuggled into the warmth. "You okay?"

Nodding, Carlos said, "Mm yeah. Wish we had a bed or something." He stood on his tip toes and whispered in James's ear, "I love fucking when it's raining."

Shivers racked down James's spine, and he pulled back to look at Carlos in the eyes, "Who said we needed a bed to accomplish that?" His voice bore a challenge. They were alone, everyone having taken off when the rain began.

Carlos only smiled, then leaned up to kiss James. Challenge accepted.

* * *

"Dad." Logan breathed out, the word so alien on his lips now. His grip on the doorknob was so tight he could feel his hand going numb, and bile was slowly rising up in his throat.

The man who he had last saw inside of a courtroom was now standing in front of him, a frown perched upon his familiar, yet so distant face.

"Logan." The man said, stepping forward into the apartment, which made Logan take three long steps back. "Enough is enough. You've had your fun, now it's time to come home."

Home? Logan shook his head. What was he talking about? Minnesota wasn't his home...barely ever was unless one of his friends was by his side. "Dad." Logan tried again, desperately seeking some solid ground in this situation, "You-you're not supposed to be here. You should go-"

But his father stepped forward again, nodding, "I will. After you pack up some of your stuff and come with me."

His stomach now doing flips, Logan felt panic begin to well up inside him, "No dad. I-I'm not leaving-"

"Logan!" His father yelled, sharp and full of anger, "I am tired of these games. Your mother is tired of this as well." His voice quieted, softer but still full of that firm _do not contradict me _tone, "We've suffered enough because of your mistakes. It's time to come home and fix things."

Taking in a shuddering breath, Logan said, "I...I didn't do anything wrong."

In response, his father slammed his hand against the wall, a sign of the fury he was holding back leaking through. "Nothing wrong?" His father gritted out, "Nothing wrong? What the fuck do you think...that everything back home is just fine?" His fingers curled into a fist, and Logan couldn't help but remember every time those strong fingers formed into a vehicle for so much pain.

"You're mother lost her job. I got stripped of my title...back to the lower ranks of new doctors and interns." He gave a humorless laugh, "No Logan. You have a lot you need to come home and fix."

Another step closer, "The first of which, getting you help with your problem that got us into this mess in the first place."

Even though Logan wasn't still sure how he felt about his parents, the pain they had suffered still gnawed at him with great guilt filled bites. But the fear of what his father was saying was stronger than any remorse he felt for the man in front of him."No. No! You can't take me back to him. What he's doing is wrong."

"There's nothing to discuss Logan." His father shot back, this time getting close enough to grab onto Logan, who yelped and tried to jerk out of his grip. "You will go to your room. Pack, then leave here. You don't need these people in you life."

Logan jerked his arms away, bringing up his hands to his ears and squeezing his eyes shut. All he had ever heard in the past few days was everyone telling him what to think, what was _right_ for him. Now...he wasn't sure. Everyone's words, their own thoughts and opinions swirled in his mind, and he couldn't focus. He felt like he was tumbling into a dark hole and the fall was taking his breath away. He was so confused...what did he want? What was right?

He didn't know anymore.

His father grabbed him again, both hands now grasping Logan's wrists to drag his hands down. "You listen to me Logan." When Logan refused to open his eyes, his father reared his hand back and forcefully slapped Logan hard against the face. Logan would have tumbled to the floor, the sheer force from the blow even making his knees buckle, but his father hoisted him back upwards roughly, repeating his demand, "Listen to me Logan!" The man screamed once more.

But then Logan's eyes opened, and all his father could see was his own fury mirrored back at him. There was a moment, when everything was still, then it all changed. "No!" Logan screamed, then used both hands to suddenly push his father back.

It was his own surprise that caught him off guard, and the elder Mitchell let go of Logan, not expecting this sudden physical repose. As soon as he finished stumbling back, his grip on Logan now gone, he saw his son turn on his heels and dart off down a hallway, into his room.

Logan slammed his bedroom door shut behind him, locking it with quivering fingers. But he didn't have time to take a breath. He could hear his fathers heavy footsteps following him, and he knew he didn't have much time. He darted to the other side of the room and grabbed a large dresser Kendall and he shared, then quickly pushed it up against the locked door. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew it was overkill, but the man had pushed him, and he could feel everything inside breaking with every throb in his face where his father's anger had landed.

_Bang! Bang! Bang!_

Heavy banging against the door caused Logan to jump, then slump down, pushing his back against the dresser as if giving it more weight against hiding from the monster on the other side of the door.

_Bang! Bang! Bang! _

The pounding was like thunder that rattled the apartment. His father was screaming at him obscenities and demands that Logan blocked out with hands pressed tight against his ears. His eyes were closed, forcing himself into the security of his mind. But...things had shifted. His mind wasn't where it was minutes ago, before his father came barreling back into his life. Now things were broken and twisted, and Logan wasn't sure what was right and what was real.

_Bang! Bang! Bang!_

But what he _was_ sure of...

_Bang! Bang! Bang!_

Was that he wasn't opening that door.

* * *

"Where have you been?"

Kendall turned to his mother, regarding her with a smile as he held out his hands and took one of the grocery bags she was holding. He was standing in front of the elevator, waiting patiently for the cab to make it's way down to the lobby of the Palm Woods. He was eager to get back to Logan, silently hoping the boy hadn't woken since he left.

"Just went out. Logan's back." At his mothers inquisitive eyebrow raise, he answered, "We...talked."

She nodded, "And..."

"And...I think things are going to be okay. It's going to be a long road but...I'm willing to do whatever it takes." He answered, sighing when the bell dinged and the door opened. As the two stepped inside the cab, his mother spoke.

"Well I'm glad to hear that Kendall. You know I love Logan, and I'm happy that the two of you are so happy together." She gave him a lovingly little hip check, "But let this be a lesson to you. Lies and secrets in a relationship only makes things worse."

Nodding, Kendall answered her, "I know. I really did learn from this. These last couple of days have been torture." The door dinged again, then opened, and the two began walking down the hallway to the apartment. "Are you busy tonight? Logan and I kinda want to talk about our future a bit and it would be a big help if you could maybe give us some tips on what to expect."

Smiling, his mother nodded, "Sure thing honey. What about-" Here she stopped frowning at what was in front of her, "Did you leave the door unlocked again? What have I told you about leaving the door open when you leave?"

Frowning, Kendall walked over to their open apartment door, stepping inside, "No. I know I locked it cause it was just Logan here when I left." He placed the grocery bag on the dinning room table, looking around the seemingly empty apartment, "Maybe James and Carlos are back." He turned to his mother who was already unloading her grocery bag in the kitchen, "I'm just going to check on Logan okay?"

She nodded, "Okay. Tell him were having pasta for dinner."

Nodding, Kendall walked down the hallway to his closed bedroom door, grabbed the doorknob and turned it...

Nothing.

Frowning, Kendall knocked on the door, "Logan? It's Kendall...the door is locked." The two never locked the door unless they were engaging in certain activities that they didn't want to be interrupted on. It was unusual for them to have the door locked otherwise. He could hear movement and shuffling in his room, so he knew Logan was in there.

Trying again, Kendall knocked louder, "Logan. Baby. Open up right now." Still no response. Now getting nervous Kendall let go of the door knob and rushed out into the living room to cut through it and get to the kitchen. He ran towards a small drawer and pulled it open quickly and began rummaging around in it.

"Honey?" Mrs. Knight asked when she saw her son, "Whats going on?"

"The door to our room is locked. But Logan's in there." He finally found what he was looking for, a key, and dashed back down the hallway to his room. The sound of his mothers heels were close behind him.

He reached the door and banged on it again, "Logan. It's Kendall. I'm going to open the door."

Still no response. He turned to his mother with a nervous look, then turned back to the door, sliding the key in and turning it. When it clicked, he tried to open the door, but found it surprisingly stuck.

"There's something...keeping it closed." Kendall said with surprise, shoving the key into his pocket and pushing his shoulder up against the door. It took a few tries, but eventually the object blocking the door gave way enough where Kendall could open the door wide enough to slide inside.

"Honey?" Mrs. Knight asked, but Kendall turned to his mother and said, "Just wait here. I'll call you if I need you."

She nodded, and Kendall slipped inside his room. When he finally turned and looked inside, his stomach twisted with fear.

The room was a mess. The covers on their bed were tossed aside, the closet looked like it exploded, and the floor was littered with books and other things that they owned. In the middle of the chaos was Logan, frantically stuffing a duffel bag with clothing.

"Logan?" Kendall said tentatively, walking over to his boyfriend. Logan either was ignoring him or didn't hear him, but when Kendall gently placed a hand on the shorter boys shoulder, Logan gasped and turned around, jumping back so violently that he fell to the floor, scrambling away from Kendall.

"Logan!" Kendall exclaimed, holding up his hands to show he didn't mean the boy any harm, "Baby it's just me. You don't have to be scared." But Logan _was_ scared, Kendall could see it clearly in his eyes. They were blown wide, two giant dark orbs filled to the brim with trepidation that pain and agony were merely moments away.

"What's going on? What happened?" Kendall tried, kneeling down so he was level with the boy. He didn't think standing over him while the other trembled on the floor would be comforting. He kept his voice low and calm, very aware that Logan was skittish and full of fear at this moment. It was also when Kendall noticed that Logan's eyes were red, and his pale face was streaked with tears, and a painful looking bruise was forming on his cheek.

"I-I'm-I have to-get...to go." Logan stumbled over his words, his eyes darting around the room, taking everything in then just as quickly moving onto the next object.

"Go?" Kendall said, trying, and failing, to keep the hysteria out of his voice, "Go where? You can't go."

In a sudden change in behavior, suddenly Logan was back up, standing, grabbing his bag and nearly shouting, "I'm going and you can't stop me. I have to go. I can't do this again. I can't. I have to-to leave. I can't be here. He'll come back. He come back and take me away and I can't go there so I have to go somewhere else."

"Who." Kendall demanded, standing with Logan and taking another step forward then stopping when Logan physically shrank from him. It tore at the blonds heart to see it, and was completely confused. What had happened to his love since he last left him? He wasn't making any sense. "I'm not trying to stop you. I just want to know what's going on." He made his voice sound calm and reassuring, but inside he was frantic.

"Have to go-" Logan started again, but Kendall cut him off. The dazed, hazy and hurt look in the boys eyes was scaring Kendall so bad. He desperately tried to get a hold of this situation.

"Why?" Kendall took a deep breath, not wanting to scare off the boy, "Why do you have to leave? Who are you afraid of coming back?"

Eyes darting everywhere again, his fist tightened on the duffel, "My dad." Logan finally whispered, then his voice grew fierce, "I can't stay here. He'll come back-"

"Wait!" Kendall said, blocking Logan's path when the brunette tried to get past him. He couldn't let Logan go off alone, not in this state, not like this. The boy was trembling, pale and breathing hard. He had barely even regarded Kendall, and the blond was sure that something happened since he last saw Logan, something bad that made his love suffer some kind of nervous break down.

And Logan's father? Had his father come back? As far as Kendall knew, the elder Mitchell was not allowed near Logan until he had turned 18. And even then the courts recommended Logan get a restraining order against his parents. And that bruise on Logan's face? That had to come from somewhere. Kendall's blood began to boil. If Mr. Mitchell came back and hurt Logan...

"Please." Logan begged, clenching and unclenching the duffel he held in his hands, "I have to go. You-you can't stop me." His voice was breaking, and Kendall was sure that Logan wasn't far off from completely becoming lost. Kendall knew he could stop Logan, if he wanted to, but that wasn't what the boy needed. And didn't they just agree that they would always do what the other needed?

"I'm not, and I wont stop you." Kendall answered, but stepped forward again when Logan tried to step around him, "But I'm coming with you."

Head shaking, "No. No I can-I'll be okay-" Logan said, but Kendall had turned and grabbed his own duffel bag from his old hockey days out of the closet, then tossed it on his bed, "You're not going anywhere without me okay?" Kendall said, turning to Logan who was blinking up at him with wide, fear filled eyes, "You're not alone." Kendall reiterated, then began to stuff his own clothing into the bag. He didn't take much time doing so, worrying about things if they matched or fit or whatever. Logan was looking around, getting jittery, and Kendall knew he was running out of time. Finally he finished, tossing in a last pair of socks, then grabbed Logan's hand, "Let's go."

Nodding, Logan let Kendall lead him to the door. Kendall opened it, then squeezed the two of them through the small opening. When they were free of the room, they both came face to face with his worried mother.

"What's going on?" She asked, glancing at the duffel bags.

"We have to go...somewhere. I'll need to borrow the car." Kendall answered, anticipating a fight as soon as she opened her mouth, "I know this doesn't make. But...please. I'll explain everything. Please just trust me." Kendall begged.

Even though she wanted to continue to argue, Mama Knight took one look at Logan, who had both his hands wrapped around Kendall's hand and was looking around him nervously like a monster might jump out from the shadows, and had to relent.

"Thank you. I will call you tonight. Please don't worry." He said, kissing her on the cheek as he headed towards the living room, Logan's ice cold hands grasping onto him like a lifeline.

"As soon as you get settled. And don't go far. The car isn't registered for out of state use." His mother said, trailing behind him as he grabbed the keys off the hook near the apartment door.

"Don't worry mom. I've got this." Kendall said to his mother as they walked out the door. He then turned to Logan, then wrapped his arm around the boy, pulling him close. "And I've got you." He whispered to the boy, kissing him on the head.

* * *

**You know I never really intended to have all my chapters start with the letter M. It wasn't until the third chapter did I realize what I was doing. Huh. Oh Well!**

**xoxo BA**


	9. Mediate

**Stories stories stories thank you for your reviews! **

* * *

Kendall had absolutely no clue where to go. He had never really any need to travel beyond the city limits, and often stayed close to the Palm Woods hotel. But they had to put some distance between the hotel and themselves, so he just headed to the coast.

Logan was still in his weird panic stage, unable to sit still. He was mumbling quietly to himself, and kept opening the glove compartment to pull out all the items, count them, then count all the words written on the items, then put them away again. Only to do the exact same thing ten minutes later.

It was driving Kendall crazy. Not so much Logan's actions, but the fact that he had no idea what caused them, and how to fix them. He wondered briefly if he should contact Dr. Mira, but stubbornly refused. He didn't want her to use this as fodder to get Logan to end their relationship, so he just focused on finding a destination for them.

When Logan opened the glove compartment a fourth time, Kendall said, "Baby. You haven't gotten much sleep. Why don't you rest for a bit while I find someplace for us to stay?"

Shaking his head, Logan looked out the window, tapping his fingers nervously against his knee, "Can't. He'll come...he'll find me-"

But Kendall reached over to Logan, grabbing his loves chin and turning his face so that he could see him. Kendall looked back and forth between the road and Logan as he said, "No baby. You're safe now okay? I'll watch over you while you sleep."

Biting his lip in worry, Logan started shaking his head, but Kendall answered every shake with a nod, "Yes Logan. Get some sleep. I promise I will wake you if anything happens."

Shifty and still scared, Logan whispered, "I-I don't know...I can't just stop." He ran his shaky hands through his hair, and Kendall had no doubt the boy was running on fumes.

Letting go of his chin, Kendall sat back and said, "Lay back, and close your eyes."

"But-"

"Just do it baby okay? I have an idea."

Making small noises of protest, but relenting, Logan shuffled in his seat so that he was leaning against the door, his eyes closed, but his twitching body a sign that he was still awake.

Slowly, Kendall began to softy sing Jason Mraz's _I Wont Give Up_. He saw Logan smile a bit at the words, and knew it was a secret love of Logan's to hear Kendall sing to him. His soothing voice washed over Logan like a warm wave, and even though it took a little while, just as Kendall finished singing, Logan was snoring gently on his side.

Sighing in relief, Kendall set to work finding somewhere for them to stay.

It took about an hour, but eventually he came to a small motel a few streets away from a beach. It was directed to tourists who were only planning on staying for a couple of days, or couldn't afford to stay anywhere nicer. The old motel was called _By-The-Sea_, and looked clean and safe enough for two teenage boys who were trying to hide away for a while.

He parked, then reluctantly left Logan in the car to reserve a room. He made sure to park up front, so he could see the car, and his sleeping boyfriend, from the window of the lobby.

He paid in cash for a cheap room for three nights, using up what he had in his wallet. He knew he would need to hit up an ATM soon, but for now he just wanted to get them settled. He got the the key from the clerk, a bored middle aged white woman with white hair and white skin who barely looked away from the TV playing some sort of Novella as she rung up Kendall. He was glad that she didn't question why a teenage boy would be here reserving a room, seemingly alone.

Afterward, he went out to the car, drove it closer to his motel room, and then parked. It only two him two trips to the room and back, once to bring in the bags, and twice to carry Logan into the room. For a moment he worried that he would have to wake up the sleeping boy, but when he slid his arms under his boyfriend and began to lift, he was much lighter than he anticipated. Kendall made sure to make a note of that, worried that Logan's stress might be making him loose too much weight. But he would take one crisis at a time.

When he finally got Logan into the room, he gently placed him on the queen size bed, sliding off the boys vans and then his jacket. Kendall was surprised that Logan stayed asleep through all of this, and couldn't help but wonder when Logan had last gotten any sleep. Though Logan muttered and moaned a bit, he never fully woke up.

Deciding that there was nothing he could do about it now, Kendall tucked Logan under the covers and then walked out of the room, locking it behind him. He dashed across the busy road to pop inside a gas station. After hitting up the ATM, he then loaded his arms with all sorts of chips, drinks and basic junk food for him and Logan. He didn't want to leave Logan alone when he was awake, so he figured he would just get it done now while Logan was still comatose. While he shopped he sent a quick text to his mother, letting her know the name of the motel they were staying at and that they were fine. He promised to explain more once he himself actually had some clue as to what was going on, and promised to stay in touch. She replied back, saying she would keep her phone nearby in case they needed her.

As soon as he was done, he walked back to the room, sighing in relief when he saw that Logan was still fast asleep. Putting the drinks in the mini-fridge, he tossed the rest of the food onto a desk, closed the curtains, and slid off his own jacket and shoes before crawling into the bed beside his love. Wrapping his long arms around Logan, he pulled him in close, then joined him the land of dreams.

* * *

"Ha! I beat you!" Carlos exclaimed, jumping out of the elevator to the second floor of their hotel. 2J was just down the hall, but his eyes were focused on James breathing heavily after he had just busted through the door to the stairwell. His hands were on his knees and his breath was coming out in short gasps.

After finishing his victory dance, Carlos continued, "I always wondered which way was faster." He walked over to James. "Ya know for someone who works out all the time, you sure are slow."

Shooting Carlos a glare, James replied, "Because you _tripped_ me before I could get to the stairway!" Suddenly James shot up, not so tired anymore, and Carlos soon found himself pinned to the wall near the elevator, James pulling Carlos's arms over his head as he devoured his loves mouth.

Whimpering and bucking against James, Carlos was flooded with lust and need, surprised that it would come back after being stated not to long ago. They had never had public sex before, but that quickie in the gazebo sure made Carlos see why so many people seemed to enjoy it. He sure as hell did.

Finally James pulled back, licking his sore lips. He had not been able to stop kissing Carlos, and really had no desire to stop anyways.

"Haven't you had enough?" Carlos said huskily, grinding his hips against James.

The pretty boy smirked, then leaned in close, "Never." He whispered, staring deep into Carlos's eyes.

The Latino felt his heart rate speed up and his stomach do flips. He wanted to believe it...so desperately.

James slid his hands down, trailing his fingers along Carlos's arms, until his hands cupped Carlos's face, "I'm never going to leave you. Until you get sick of me, I'm staying with you. Right here."

Carlos felt his hands fall to his sides, his mind whirling with James's words. It's what he wanted to hear, to believe, to _know_. But was it true?

"You don't know what's going to happen in the future." Carlos whispered, scared to touch James in case he fell apart.

But James shook his head with a smile, "Didn't I ever tell you I was psychic?"

Letting out a small chuckle at James's obvious lie, Carlos said, "No. I don't think I ever knew that about you."

Smiling even more, James slid an arm around Carlos's waist and pulled him forward, giving him a quick chaste kiss before they began walking towards their apartment.

"It's true. In the future I see my name in lights-" James began but Carlos cut him off.

"Well we don't need a psychic to know that."

"Hush." James said, but smiled at his boyfriends confidence in him, "I see you and I in an amazing mansion overlooking all of L.A. With a guest wing for Kendall and Logan and their three kids."

Snorting, Carlos said, "More like six. Kendall told me he's going to adopt kids until he and Logan run out of money." He knew the blond boy always wanted a big family, and though the idea of having a surrogate was appealing, Kendall always said he liked the idea of giving kids who already needed a home one rather than just making new kids.

Laughing, James opened the door to their apartment, stepping inside with Carlos, "I can totally see that happening." But then he and Carlos stopped short at what they saw before them.

"Okay...I however did not see this happening." James said, frowning at what he saw.

There were two police officers sitting on the orange couch with Mamma Knight, with Mr. Bitters hovering nearby with his usual scowl.

"Um...what's going on?" James said, taking Carlos's hand and dragging him into the room.

Carlos was clenching James's hand, his nerves and fear shooting through his body. "What happened? Is Logan and Kendall okay? Oh my God where's Katie?" Carlos exclaimed. He couldn't help the fear as it tumbled in a rush out of his mouth. With his father being a cop, he knew that uniforms at the door always meant either trouble had happened or else someone was...

"Calm down." Mamma Knight said, standing up and walking over to the boys, "Everyone is fine."The two cops stood and walked over to the boys and Mamma Knight turned to them, "These are the other two I was telling you about. Carlos Garcia and James Diamond." She turned towards the two, "Boys this is Officer Hardy and Officer Boxen."

"You're roommates with Logan Mitchell?" Officer Boxen asked, nodding to the boys. He was tall with dark hair and dark eyes, his uniform crisp and intimidating.

"Yes. Why?" James said, "Where's Logan?"

"Safe." Mamma Knight said, then gestured for them all to sit. Once they did, she continued, "Boys...apparently Logan's father came by the apartment earlier today. We don't know what happened but...it wasn't good."

The panic rose again and Carlos exclaimed, "You said everyone was fine!"

While James was shushing him, Officer Hardy, the exact opposite of his partner with blond hair and blue eyes, took over, "According to Mrs. Knight here, he's with her son," he checked his small notebook for a moment, "Kendall. They both exited the premises soon after returning to finding Logan in the apartment alone."

"Please. Just explain to us what's going on." James begged, his mind swirling with worry for his friend.

When the dark haired officer nodded at Mamma Knight, she relayed the story to the two boys about coming back to the apartment and finding Logan in his state. "I went down to see Mr. Bitters right away. I hoped he might knew something about what happened." She nodded towards the man who had migrated into the kitchen and was currently stuffing his face with some cookies Mamma Knight had left out.

He looked over at the five, realizing they were looking at him, and loudly swallowed, "What?"

Sighing, Mamma Knight continued, "He said that he didn't see Mr. Mitchell, but according to the officers here who checked out the security cameras, Logan's father had been hanging around the building all morning."

Nodding, Officer Boxen took up where she left off, "Yes. According to security he had been watching the building, waiting for everyone to leave. Once your son left, that's when the man knew Logan was alone in the apartment. We don't know what transpired, but he wasn't in there for more than twenty minutes before he left."

"Looking angry." The other officer finished, "Boys, have you seen Mr. Mitchell at all lately?"

Both boys shook their heads.

"Do you think Logan or Mrs. Knights son has?" The officer continued.

"They would have said something, if they had." Carlos said, but James remained quiet.

"James?" Mama Knight asked at the pretty boys silence.

Sighing, James answered, "Kendall would have if he saw something. But...Logan? He's not exactly the most forthcoming with things going on with him." Then, unable to help it, he turned to Carlos and said, "Unless he's ready to talk. Then he will."

Carlos felt a knot twist up inside his stomach at James's glare, and for a moment he wondered if the pretty boy knew about him and Logan meeting this morning.

James turned back to the adults and said, "If Logan knew his father was hanging around, he most likely would have told his psychiatrist, Dr. Mira."

"To answer that, Mr. Diamond, no. Logan didn't mention anything like that to me." Said a voice from the hallway, and all heads turned to Dr. Mira and Mr. Bitters walking over to the group.

"Thank you so much for calling me Mrs. Knight. I'm just so distraught to hear what happened." The woman said, walking over to the elder Knight and taking her hands, "You've heard from Logan? He's all right?"

Nodding, Mamma Knight answered, "I got a text from Kendall. They're settled in some motel outside the city."

Dr. Mira nodded, unaware that both James and Carlos were glaring at her. "You should call them and tell them it's safe to come back. I'd also like to speak with Logan, get an idea of his mental state." She sat gently next to the woman, squeezing her hand comfortingly, "I'm sure he'll be all right."

Frowning, Mrs. Knight said, "I'm not sure having them come back yet is such a good idea."

"We're inclined to agree with Mrs. Knight." Officer Hardy said, standing with his partner. "We have yet to find out where Mr. Mitchell is, and since he has no knowledge of the boys whereabouts, having them stay there for now would be the best." He nodded to the others, "We'll be back later to ask some more questions, but for now we are going to look into a couple of leads. We'll be in touch."

"I'm going to go to...if I'm not needed?"Mr. Bitters said, making a hasty exit after the police while stuffing his pockets with some more cookies.

"Why did you call her?" Carlos exclaimed jumping up from the couch to glare at the doctor.

"Carlos!" Mamma Knight admonished, frowning at the boys sudden outburst.

"Yeah." James agreed, standing as well, "Shes been causing all sorts of trouble for Kendall and Logan. Why are you suddenly on her side!"

"Whoa! Whoa!" Mrs. Knight said, standing up and putting her hands on her hips, "_First_ of all this is not how we...normally...treat guests in our home. And secondly the only side I'm on is making sure that Mr. Mitchell is found and that Kendall and Logan are all right." She sighed and turned to Dr. Mira, "I called Dr. Mira because I thought she should know about what was happening because..." She turned back to the boys, her face serious, "You didn't see Logan. It was...well...it wasn't good."

Both boys looked at each other, fear for their friend evident, but Carlos turned back and said, "Fine. I want Logan to be okay too. But _she_ is just going to use this to make Logan break up with Kendall!"

"Excuse me?" Mama Knight said to Carlos, but James took over.

"Shes been trying to get Logan to break up with Kendall for like a week now!"

"Boys." Dr. Mira said as she stood, "This whole situation is far more complex and difficult than you all realize-"

"The only thing we need to know is that Logan and Kendall are in love and meant to be together, and...and...you just need to knock it off!" Carlos exclaimed then stopped and turned to James, "Wait...how did you know what she was doing?"

"Boys!" Mamma Knight yelled, holding out her hands to stop them, "Look...I've actually spoken with Dr. Mira about all this. Kendall and Logan and their relationship."

Blinking, both boys said, "You have?"

"Yes. Ultimately we both agree that it's up to them to decide what they want to with their future, but I have taken into consideration Dr. Mira's point of view on this." Mamma Knight said, sitting down with a tired huff. The two boys followed her actions.

"You agree that Kendall and Logan should break up? That...Logan needs to learn how to do be alone?" James said, ignoring Carlos's frown at him. It was too late to hide that he knew more than the Latino realized.

"Honestly boys, I need a second opinion on these things. You're my sons, all of you, and I love you. And well...love makes you blind." She ran a hand through James's hair, smiling fondly at the boy. "Most parents don't have to worry about their sons dating. And, what Logan is going through is way out of my scope, and I need another set of eyes to tell me what I'm missing. That's where Dr. Mira comes in." She nodded at the elder woman, "I'm aware of what she thinks, and she is aware of what I think. But in the end it's up to Logan and Kendall to figure this out. We can give our advice and help them as much as we can, but we are both well aware that they will make their own decisions in the end."

"Do...do you think they'll be okay?" Carlos asked fearfully. He knew now that James knew more than he realized, and he would have to face James soon, but right now he needed to focus on Logan.

Dr. Mira sat down and said, "With Mr. Mitchell? They're safe for now. Their relationship? That's for them to decide. But," She turned to the elder Knight, "From what Mrs. Knight has told me, Logan is in very good hands."

"The best." Carlos shot at the woman, his glare speaking volumes.

Giving him a soft smile, she said, "Yes. And...I'm beginning to wonder if I've underestimated these two."

* * *

"...twenty two, twenty three, twenty four..."

Kendall jerked awake, the sound of Logan's voice dragging him out of sleep and into the reality they had situated themselves in. Rubbing a hand over his tired face, he sat up, then blinked three times to make sure he wasn't dreaming.

Logan was sitting on the floor in front of the beds, both of his and Kendall's possessions scattered all around him, organized into specific categories. Their shirts, pants, underwear, socks and everything else that they had brought with them were laid out into neat piles on the floor. Logan was currently counting each item, then gently placing it back into its pile.

Kendall ran his hands through his hair, glad that Logan didn't take off while he was still sleeping. _Gotta be more careful_, he thought to himself, then rose from the bed. On the small table next to him, his phone beeped. Grabbing it, saw he had a text from his mother.

_Just spoke w/police. Mr. Mitchell **was** at hotel. Call me asap._

Kendall's blood boiled with silent rage. So the man _was_ there, harassing Logan no doubt. He looked over at the boy, still in his own little world, and swore he would never let the elder Mitchell hurt Logan again.

Putting his phone down, Kendall walked over to Logan, crouching next to the boy and gently laying a hand on his back, "Logan?" He said quietly, trying not to scare him.

"Busy." Logan muttered, then continued counting.

Sighing, Kendall continued, "C'mon baby." Then, when Logan continued to ignore him, Kendall tried, "I know you must be hungry."

At that, Logan faltered a bit.

"I got some food. You want to pig out and see what's on TV?" Kendall asked, and then smiled when Logan turned and looked at him. It wasn't much, but it was progress. His eyes weren't so hazy, and he held Kendall's gaze evenly.

The brunette bit his lip, his hands still full of a pile of shirts, "Um...but I need to finish counting."

"Afterward? It'll all still be here, I promise." Kendall said, reaching out and gently taking the clothing from Logan's hands. He placed it on the floor, smoothing out the pile, then took Logan's hands and helped him stand. When they were fully upright, Kendall tentatively leaned forward to give Logan a small kiss, just to see how far he could go. He could tell that Logan wasn't still a hundred percent, but he seemed more here then he had been a while ago.

Logan reciprocated the kiss, but only just. He quickly pulled back, his face red with a blush.

"S-sorry." Logan muttered, "I-I can't...I'm not-" But Kendall quickly soothed his fears.

"Its okay baby." Kendall said, running a hand through Logan's dark hair, "Don't worry, I've got you."

As luck would go, there was a Mythbusters marathon on TV, which Logan quickly became immersed in. With the bed full of chips, jerky and various sugary soft drinks, the two boys snuggled together, watching things being blown up for a couple of hours.

Realizing that he should really get back to his mother, Kendall turned to Logan and whispered, "Baby?"

"Mm?" Logan answered, eyes still glued to the screen.

"I'm going to go call my mom, let her know we're okay." Kendall said, slowly starting to sit up.

But Logan grabbed onto him, "Does she know where we are? What if my father finds out? What if he comes here-" But Kendall quickly shushed him.

"Easy Logie. Mom wont tell your dad where we are I promise. She's just worried and wants to make sure we're okay." Kendall continued, "Also I sorta took the rental car, so I'm sure shes pretty concerned about that as well."

Biting his lip, still unsure, Logan sat up and wrapped his arms around his knees, "Okay." He answered, then, "But don't go far!"

Chuckling, Kendall leaned forward and kissed Logan on the forehead, "Promise."

It was still raining out, but when Kendall walked outside there was a large overhang that covered him from the water. He pulled out his phone and called home.

"Hello?"

"Hey mom." Kendall answered, turning to look inside the room through the window beside him. He saw Logan still sitting where he left him, eyes on the TV.

"Oh honey I'm so glad to hear from you. Are you okay? How's Logan?"

"Fine. Were both fine. Logan seems better. He just needed...space." Kendall figured that was the best thing he could say.

"I understand. Dr Mira just told me-" Mamma Knight began, but Kendall cut her off.

"Dr. Mira? You told her about this?" Kendall shot at her as panic welled up in his stomach.

"Of course." Mamma Knight said, "She was at the apartment earlier-"

"She was at the apartment?" Kendall nearly shriek, "Did you let her into our room? What? Did she see the mess and start thinking I have a temper issue or something."

"Honey," Mama Knight began, "First of all, you _do_ have a temper issue. Secondly, she was only here to help."

"I don't trust her." Kendall shot back.

"I know, and I know it's hard for you to understand given whats been going on the past couple of days. But I know that she has Logan's welfare in mind just as much as you do. She has to look at this from a different perspective."

He began to grumble something, but instead answered, "Okay Mom. I trust you, so if you trust Dr. Mira, then that's fine. But as soon as she starts talking about me and Logan breaking up again-"

"Don't worry honey. She admitted she was immensely impressed with how you handled this situation, and she's beginning to reconsider her thoughts concerning you two together. But for now, let's just focus on whats going on. I spoke with the police and they did see that Mr. Mitchell was here earlier."

"How did he know Logan was alone?" Kendall mused.

"The hotel security shows that he had been watching for a while, waiting for all of us to leave. He knew Logan was alone when he went in." Mamma Knight answered.

Letting out a breath at the rage building inside, Kendall said, "Okay. Did the cops find Mr. Mitchell yet?"

"No. But they'll let us know if they do. Until then sit tight. If you need anything let me know. I can borrow Tyler's Mom's car if I need to get anywhere. No worries. Just take care of yourself and Logan okay?"

"Okay. Love you mom." Kendall said.

"Love you to." She answered and then hung up.

Kendall hung up as well but didn't go back inside. He was fuming and didn't want to go back to Logan with the thoughts of mauling his lovers father evident in his eyes. He took a few deep breaths, and shook his head, trying to rattle the thoughts away. After a couple of minutes he went back inside.

Logan was still sitting on the bed, and expectantly looked up at Kendall with fearful eyes.

Kendall climbed back onto the bed and wrapped Logan up in his arms, "Mom called the police. They saw on security that your dad was hanging around. They haven't caught him yet, but the police are looking for him."

"A-are they going to arrest him?" Logan whispered.

Sighing, Kendall shrugged, "I don't know. He broke the law by seeing you like that, and you could always press charges-" But at those words, Logan jerked back and jumped off the bed.

"Press charges? I've already ruined my parent's lives I can't do that." Logan nearly shrieked, pacing the small room back and forth.

"Baby. You don't have to do anything," Kendall began, walking up to Logan and grabbing his lovers wrists with a gentle hold, "But I know he hurt you." When Logan looked away Kendall placed a tentative hand on Logan's bruised cheek, "Will you tell me what happened after I left?"

Logan made a small, weak noise that indicated he didn't want to, but when he looked back at Kendall's imploring green eyes, he knew he couldn't hold back any longer.

Sitting on the edge of the couch, Kendall followed him and listened attentively as Logan recapped his story. When he got to the part where his father hit him, Kendall sucked in a breath, closed his eyes, and pulled Logan in close, burying his face in his loves hair.

"Can't stand to see you hurt." Kendall whispered. Logan nodded and wrapped his arms around Kendall's waist, finishing his story.

"You were so...gone when I found you." Kendall said after Logan was quiet for a few moments.

"I don't know. I don't remember much...I just...broke for a while. Everyone for the past few days have been telling me what's right and what's wrong. I-I just...I just didn't know what to believe anymore. What's real...what I can rely on."

Nodding, Kendall pulled back, looking at Logan, "You can rely on me Logan. Never forget that." He pulled in the boy and kissed his forehead. "I don't want you to ever doubt how I feel about you...so I want you to tell me the truth Logan. Right now. Tell me what you feel. What do you really want from me...from us?"

Logan looked into Kendall's eyes, and thought. Then he thought some more. He loved Kendall...that was a given. Loved his touch, loved his smile, loved his everything. Even though Kendall lied to him, he apologized and really seemed to have regretted his decisions. And then Kendall was there, _again_, to help him when his entire world crumbled around him. Kendall, his white Knight in everything, even name. What more could he possibly ask from the boy? What more did the boy possibly have to give to him?

Finally, Logan answered, "Forever. I want...forever from you."

Sucking in a deep breath, Kendall's throat hitched as he swallowed back the emotion that was threatening to rise up inside him. He cupped Logan's face and whispered, "You got it." Then leaned in and captured Logan's lips.

He set to work, kissing and tonguing the boy with everything in him. He slid his hands down, running his thumbs along Logan's hips, causing the brunette to gasp in pleasure. Pulling back just an inch, Kendall whispered, "Can I? Please?"

Shuddering, Logan nodded, "Yes. Take me. I need you so bad. Make me forget everything but us Ken."

Letting out a groan, Kendall quickly pulled Logan so he was standing. Then in one swift move he lifted Logan up, causing the smart boy to shriek in surprise, then give a small giggle. Kendall walked over to the bed and laid his love gently down. Logan sat up as Kendall pulled his shirt off before pushing him down on the bed, making quick work of unbuttoning Logan's pants. While he was doing this, he began sucking on Logan's throat, nipping and biting and kissing until a large bruise formed there. His mark on the boy until it was time for a more permanent one.

Situating himself between Logan's legs, Kendall reached into Logan's undone pants and pulled out his aching member, stroking it up and down in his large hand. The soft skin slid under his palm, each movement eliciting whimpers and moans from the boy it belonged to.

Kendall moved down to Logan's nipples, his tongue darting out to trace the pink orb until it hardened, then he nipped it gently as he swiped his thumb over the tip of Logan's member.

"Ah! Ken." Logan cried, trying desperately to not jut his hips up. His hands clenched the blond locks, and he kept his eyes wide open to watch as Kendall worked his way over to Logan's other nipple.

"Baby you're killing me." Logan gasped out at Kendall continued stroking, making sure to swipe the pink tip every time.

Finally Logan pushed Kendall away so he could lean forward and kiss the boy, desperate and full of hunger that needed to be stated now.

"Eager are we?" Kendall asked after the kiss ended, sitting up to take off his own shirt.

Logan moaned at the sight of Kendall's toned body, and reached up to caress his chest and abs with trembling fingers.

"So sexy." Logan mumbled, then smiled when Kendall took one of his hands and began placing soft kisses on each fingertip.

"I'm a monster compared to how beautiful you look." Kendall said, then smiled when Logan choked in surprise at those words, his face flushing a bright red.

"Y-you-you don't have to say that." Logan stuttered as Kendall continued undressing the both of them, "I-I'm not-" But Kendall shushed him.

"Quiet. You're beautiful. You always have been." Kendall said, then draped his naked body over Logan, kissing him full on the lips once again. Their hands wandered and stroked over their naked bodies, caressing the skin now glistening with sweat.

Kendall eventually pulled back and said, "Lube. I know I packed it. Where-" But Logan pointed off the bed to one of the piles he had made.

"There. With our phones and wallets." Logan answered in between gasps.

Kendall smirked at the boy, "Placed it with our necessities huh?"

Cracking a smile, Logan shrugged, "You know it."

After he fetched the lube, Kendall made quick work covering his fingers with the slick liquid, then slid a finger between Logan's open legs.

"Feels good?" Kendall asked as he twisted and pushed the finger in and out. When Logan nodded and his body relaxed a bit, Kendall slid another finger in. Logan tensed a bit at this, but was quick to breathe in and out, relaxing his body some more.

To speed things up, Kendall was more than ready for the next part, he pushed in, narrowing down on Logan's sweet spot he knew to well.

"Ah! Kendall!" Logan cried out.

"You like that baby?" Kendall said, pushing on the spot over and over.

"Fuck yes! Ah so good!" Logan cried out again as he threw his head back, gripping the sheets.

"Gonna give you something even better." Kendall said, his voice filled with so much lust it came out deep and husky. He pulled out his fingers, then quickly coated his member before positioning himself.

"Ready baby?" Kendall asked, and when Logan nodded, he slid inside, gentle and slow. He held his breath, wanting to make this last for Logan. Before long, he was full hilt, buried deep inside the boy.

"M-move." Logan begged, but Kendall shook his head.

"Not yet Logan. You're still too tight. Breathe for me."

Logan made a angry noise that turned into a pathetic moan when Kendall humped him, causing the buried member to brush up against Logan's prostate.

"Relax." Kendall whispered, and watched as Logan breathed in deep for a few moments. Eventually Kendall could feel Logan relax around him, and to reward the boy he pulled back and thrust in deep.

"Yes! Please give it to me!" Logan cried out, and fell into a series of cries and grunts as Kendall thrust into the boy over and over.

The bed squeaked and groaned as the two moved together, Kendall's thrusting becoming harder and deeper. Logan could barely keep quiet, and Kendall's moans above him just egged him on.

Eventually Logan wrapped his legs around Kendall and cried out, "Harder baby! I want to come!"

Sitting back to get a better leverage, Kendall thrust in harder, and eventually Logan's member began sprouting out his seed all over his stomach and chest.

Watching his love come undone, Kendall could feel Logan's muscles around his member tighten, and that was enough to spill himself inside of Logan. They both gasped and moaned at coming down from their high, and Kendall collapsed on top of Logan, but was careful not to crush the boy.

"So...good." Logan moaned out, then tensed his muscles teasingly, as Kendall was still buried inside him.

"Ah!" Kendall whimpered, then pulled his sensitive member out of Logan, "That was mean." Kendall said with a pout.

Giggling, Logan rolled over to Kendall kissing him on the nose, "Thank you."

Smiling, Kendall shrugged, "You don't have to thank me for sex. I'm always up for that." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at Logan, who laughed again and shook his head.

"No. I mean, yeah, thank you for that. That was awesome, but...thank you for...everything else." Logan finished quietly, hoping Kendall got what he was trying to say.

Which he did. He slid his body back on top of Logan's naked one, and pinned the boy down, kissing him fiercely on the lips. "You don't thank me for that okay? I'll take care of you. Always. No matter what."

Nodding, his stomach rolling with emotion, Logan said, "Right. Sorry."

"Don't apologize. I love you. And you love me. Everything else is just...secondary." Kendall said running a hand along Logan's cheek.

"I do love you." Logan said imploringly. "And I promise to take care of you too. I promise."

"What I really want you to promise is to stop going to everyone else with your problems baby. You and I...we're a team got it? I need you to be honest with me. I can't help you if you don't let me know what's going on in that big brain of yours."

Biting his lip, Logan said, "I promise to be honest...if you do."

Wincing, Kendall nodded, "I deserve that. But yes. I will." He held out his hand as if to shake, "Deal?"

But instead of shaking his hand, Logan wiggled his hips, showing to Kendall that his boyfriends long, lean, naked body on to of him was starting to result in a particular reaction from his nether regions, "How about we seal the deal in a different way?"

Kendall's grin split his face right in two, "I think we can manage that."

* * *

**xoxo BA**


End file.
